35 Times Male Authors Tried To Describe Women And Ended Up Providing Comedy Gold

"How many times will I have to read breasts described like they're caffeinated Yorkshire Terriers?"

Sophia

• Published in Interesting
• March 13, 2024

In the vast, sometimes bewildering world of literature, a peculiar phenomenon emerges when male authors try to step into the shoes of female characters—only to trip over the laces. This often leads to portrayals that are less 'deep and complex woman' and more 'walking collection of body parts', with an oddly specific focus on breasts and legs.

It's as if some writers are crafting characters based on a mannequin rather than a real woman, suggesting these authors might know women the same way fish know bicycles.

Enter the hilarious hall of fame: Reddit's r/MenWritingWomen. This online sanctuary is where such literary blunders are not just exposed but celebrated with the glee of a cat who's found an open can of tuna.

Here, members share gems of descriptions so outlandishly off-mark you'd think the characters are aliens in disguise trying to pass off as human females. From the infamous 'breasted boobily' to descriptions that make you wonder if the author has ever actually had a conversation with a woman, this group has it all.

But it's not all laughs and face-palms. Amidst the chuckles, there's a serious undercurrent urging writers to do better—to see female characters as fully fleshed-out individuals, not just as a sum of their (often exaggerated) parts.

Just take a look at these examples and prepare for a lot of face palms!

1. Oh, how we wish!

2. Three and a half what?

3. Say her name!

4. How about that, huh?

5. What is this all about?!

6. Nailed it!

7. Women in their 30s are not that old!

8. Yorkshire Terrier racks

9. What's with the obsession?

10. All was well until...

11. How startled were they?

12. What even!

13. Dear men writers...

14. Plot hole

15. Aren't they?

16. Waste of curves

17. Butt of a boy

18. Honestly!

19. Great logic

20. Like his BFF Tim

21. Hard enough to cut paper, you say?

22. Give us more money

23. We still need a description

24. All of the above!

25. Serves you right

26. Breast boobily

27. Such a great assumption...

28. Have yet to read that one!

29. The alternative is...

30. A nice set of curves

31. He actually got that right

32. Accurate!

33. Why must you do that?

34. Tide Pod-hued eyes

35. Typical...

r/MenWritingWomen isn't just poking fun at the awkward dance of male authors with female perspectives; it's a playful nudge towards richer, more authentic storytelling. So, to all the aspiring authors out there, remember: women are people, not puzzles.

Get it right, and you might just avoid becoming the next viral sensation for all the wrong reasons!

Comment down your thoughts, or share this article for all your family and friends to see!

Sophia