Hilarious Things People Used To Think Were Actually True, But Learned Later In Life That They Were Wrong
As kids we're made to believe in all sorts of crazy things, either by our parents filling our heads with stories or our siblings giving us cruel reasons for why things are the way they are. Kids are mostly gullible and believe pretty much anything you tell them.
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Maybe it's because we are so full of wonder as kids that our childhood innocence sweeps us off our feet and we're happy with the 'reasonable answers' to the plethora of questions that we have. But as we grow older, we realize that maybe those reasonable answers are not so reasonable at all.
Take a look at the following recounts people shared on 'Askreddit' when someone asked "What's the dumbest thing you believed as a kid?"
1. PLOT TWIST!
"When I was a kid, my mom explained to me that we all had belly buttons because that’s how our moms fed us before we were born. So I thought when you got pregnant, your belly button opened up and you just put whatever you wanted to down there. Like I thought women were just shoving chicken legs in their belly buttons."
2. I'm not going to lie, I am pretty damn sure I thought this too
"That actors/TV characters would have to come back into a studio for each rerun of a show/movie. I would always be so amazed that people would have the time to go into a room with a camera multiple times a day just so I could watch them do the same thing over and over again." —Daking4001
3. Makes sense
"I used to think that laugh tracks were somehow real life, like I was hearing everyone else laughing who was watching the same show I was. In hindsight this is really stupid; obviously the sound is coming from the speakers, but growing up we only had TV at my grandma's place and I remember laughing really loud when the laugh track came on so all her neighbors would think I got the joke too." —CouldHaveBeenEasy
4. This one is.... different.
"I thought that the show was still going on during the commercial breaks, so I was always worried about what I had missed while the commercials were on." —AndAndreyIsntHere
5. We never win at the ATM
"I used to watch my dad go to the ATM, look at the receipt, and get grumpy/frustrated. I knew how bank accounts and ATMs worked, but the kid-logic part of my brain figured that they also kind of worked like slot machines. In that, when you conducted some transaction on them, you got that slip with three icons on it. If you got one with three cherries, for example, you would take it inside and they would deposit $50 or whatever into your account. I figured he was frustrated because he kept losing all the time.
I even asked him a few times when he was looking at the receipt, 'Did you win?' and he was like, 'No.'" —Mr_A
6. I may have thought this one in elementary too.
"I thought that teachers sleep at school." —YourFavoriteWeird0
Now let's move onto random dumb sex thoughts. LOL. #7.
"That sex was literally sleeping next to one another and making moaning sounds.
I heard things I wanna forget." —Leinkugel
8. I can't even imagine your terror!
"I remember thinking even making contact was sex. I bumped a girl with my pelvis dangerously close in elementary. I was scared she'd get pregnant." —Evoseanzie
Driving thoughts... Lord have mercy #9
"I didn't know cars have a turn signal lever, so I thought the car knew where we were going. I thought the car would use the arrows to tell my parents where to turn." —LadyLuxlord
10. Water too?!
"I thought that drinking and driving meant any drink." —StarLordFloofer
11. LOL!
"I thought the black market was an actual market, like under a bridge or something."—Greeneyes_84
12. "You cannot cancel your order sir."
"Once I was playing with some toys and my mom was talking on the phone to her friend. I guess they were talking about kids growing up and having families someday because my mom put her hand over the phone and asked me if I wanted kids someday and if I wanted boys or girls."
"I gave it some thought and said that I wanted one boy and one girl. For the longest time after this, I thought that it had been completely decided, like my mom was just on the phone with whoever you call to place an order for kids, and my order had been finalized." —Bran_Solo
Can't forget about baby thoughts! #13
"I used to think my testicles were the eggs of my future children. Like, one day they would hatch and I'd have two kids." —shartnado3
14. Who comes up with this stuff!?
"That the gender of a baby depended on which person was trying harder during sex." —illegalmint
15. I'm picturing the expression on his face
"I had no idea that morning sickness was associated with pregnancy. My coach was concerned when I shrugged my shoulders and stated that's what was probably causing my sluggishness at football camp practice." —boredbobby32
16. One time use, huh?
"Escalator stairs were one-time-use and just kinda piled up under the floor." —stupidlyugly
17. I can't with this one. LOL
"In sports, I used to think whatever number the player wore was how old that player was. When I saw a picture of Babe Ruth my reaction was, 'That’s one big 3-year-old!'" —BurghFinsFan
18. What kind of monster gives someone anxiety over their favorite color?
"My brother had me convinced for a while that each person had to have a unique favorite color, and since his was blue, I had to change mine. On my first day of kindergarten, we had to introduce ourselves and say our favorite color. I was super stressed out because the kids in front of me picked the 'good' colors, and I kinda panicked and told everyone my favorite color was gray." —pyrotech33