Redditor Stirs Up Family Drama By Publicly Shunning SIL Over Repeated Attempts To Force Unusual ‘Adoption Views’ On Them
Disagreements within the extended family are a given. one might expect occasional arguments over politics or maybe even pizza toppings, but who knew adoption could be the catalyst for a full-blown family feud?
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Our narrator (Original Poster) and their sister-in-law had something unique in common—they were both adopted, though there was a significant difference. OP found their forever family through foster care at age six while their sister-in-law was adopted as an infant.
It all seemed like smooth sailing until the sister-in-law decided to stir the adoption pot after reconnecting with her birth family. She suddenly became a crusader for adoption rights. In her opinion, they had no right to completely sever an infant’s ties with their birth family that way.
But when she tried to rope OP into her revolution, things didn’t go as planned. OP made it clear they were thrilled to have been adopted. Sure, their sister-in-law might’ve had the perfect family, but OP’s case was different.
OP’s birth parents couldn’t care less and even referred to them as ‘shitstain’ for the first five years of their life—they didn’t even know they had a real name until getting into foster care.
Unfortunately, their newly overzealous sister-in-law refused to drop it, and the OP even started avoiding her by missing family functions.
Things finally blew up when the two clashed at a wedding. OP walked away as soon she began her ‘adoption’ speech, and things spiraled out of control.
She whined about it so much to the point she ruined the wedding. Now everyone blamed OP for not ‘handling it better.’ Well, what else was OP supposed to do?
Let’s dig into the details
A bit of background
SIL severed all tied with her birth family after discovering the ‘unfairness’ of her adoption
SIL went further to try to open OP’s eye’s to her own adoption story and birth family as a fellow adoptee. However, OP wasn’t willing to go back to the past
OP and her husband even started declining family events just to avoid SIL
The extended family has now gotten involved due to SIL’s complaints and OP is confused on how to handle the situation
We gathered some reactions from the Reddit community:
“NTA, and she is exhibiting the classic signs of being insecure with her decision so she is trying to get validation.”
“She TAH to keep trying to push you into something you don't want to do just to make her feel better.”
“How utterly absurd. You don't owe SIL anything, she sounds insufferable.”
“NTA I’m all for open adoption when the situation calls for it, such as a teenager giving up her baby, that kind of thing.”
“You handled it perfectly and I'd suggest to the two aunties that it might be that time of life for a dementia screening.”
In the court of Reddit opinion, it was NTA all the way! Walking away from unwanted confrontation was OP’s basic right, especially when their boundaries were repeatedly disregarded.
The consensus? OP handled the situation with grace and respect, making the wedding drama solely the sister-in-law’s doing. So hold your head high, OP, because you've earned Reddit’s collective nod of approval.