Devoted Mom Questions Her Priorities After Paying For Her Dog's Expensive Surgery When She Can't Afford To Do The Same For Her 26-Year-Old Son

She is torn because she can't afford to go into medical debt for her son when she is about to retire in a few years

Chelsi

• Published in Interesting
• September 6, 2022

Parents shouldn't play favorites among their kids. That is a simple rule that shouldn't be broken unless you're willing to send your children straight to therapy well into their adulthood.

Nobody prepares you to compete with a pet for the affection of your parents. OP is a 57-year-old mom to her 26-year-old son and her 5-year-old yellow Labrador retriever dog.

A year ago, OP's dog accidentally tore one of her ACLs while they were out on a hike. OP was beside herself when she saw her dog limping and in pain.

Their vet advised that ACL surgery is the only option to repair the broken ligament. It cost 15k to do the surgery but they went ahead with it since OP understandably valued her dog's health.

OP's son doesn't live with them anymore. He has a full-time job and he is pretty successful by all measures of traditional society.

He just turned 26 and OP reminded him countless times to get his own health insurance because he no longer qualifies under her health insurance.

He reassured OP that he was aware of this fact and will deal with it. This turned out to be untrue when he recently got into an awful accident while playing soccer.

He tore one of his ACLs and told OP she had to help him pay for the surgery. Apparently, he couldn't be bothered to send an email to their company's HR to enroll himself in their health insurance.

He told OP that his neglect was her fault because she didn't remind him enough about his health insurance

Below is OP'sOP said she wants to help her son but she has no idea how much the surgery will cost. Plus, they haven't financially recovered from her dog's surgery from a year ago. full post from Reddit:

OP and her husband also plan to retire in the next few years and they are unsure of the possibility if they help their son with the surgery.

OP's husband agrees with her but their relatives say she's an a**hole for paying for her dog's ACL surgery but not doing the same for her son.

If they're quick to judge OP, they should be just as quick to help pay for the surgery

In case OP's family need a visual aid to understand, here's a series of emojis

OP's son is deflecting blame to OP because he knows he colossally messed up

The scenario would totally be different if the surgeries were needed at the same time but that isn't the case

OP's son has another option he can look into if he ever stops blaming OP for his mistake

Because of what happened, OP should know that they can't ever depend on their son for financial help in the future

Based on our limited knowledge of him, he will definitely hold this against his parents if they will need his help in the future

As an aside, OP might have overpaid for her dog's ACL surgery but we don't really know where she lives

But we shouldn't forget that it's not the dog's or OP's fault that her son cannot afford his surgery

OP's son knows this but he's too petty to accept he was at fault for this very expensive lesson

It doesn't take away the fact that the American healthcare system needs a massive overhaul

The whole situation is sad. OP is feeling guilty that she can't help her own son with his urgent medical need because it's simply too expensive.

However, she shouldn't ever regret paying for her dog's surgery a year ago; no pet owner would sit and watch their furry pal cry in pain when they were fully capable of doing something. OP is not clairvoyant as she couldn't have possibly predicted this would happen to her son a year later.

Chelsi