Redditor Plans On Keeping Her Ex's Dog Because Their Current "Joint Custody" Arrangement Is Stopping Her From Moving On

They love the dogs like they are their children but for the past 10 months the GF has been paying for all of the dog's expenses

Chelsi
Redditor Plans On Keeping Her Ex's Dog Because Their Current "Joint Custody" Arrangement Is Stopping Her From Moving On

Breaking up with your significant other is one of the saddest parts of life. You spend months and years dreaming of a future together and it all falls apart in the blink of an eye.

It's tough enough dealing with the pain but separating the possessions you've accumulated over the years is like rubbing salt on a fresh wound. They are the remnants and constant reminders of the life you used to share.

If that's not tough enough, if you have kids or pets together, figuring out custody arrangements is another battle. For this recently broken-up couple, staying away from each other was extra challenging because of their two dogs.

They each had dogs when they got together more than two years ago. They didn't have any kids, so they loved their dogs like they were their children.

The dogs immediately bonded together and have been inseparable since. When OP and her BF broke up, he had to move back with his parents.

He had to leave his dog behind at OP's house. It has been 10 months since the breakup but they came to an understanding that it was best for both dogs to stay together.

OP has been financially responsible for both dogs since then. Her ex's dog recently got heartworm and was diagnosed with epilepsy — proper medication and care were both paid for by OP.

OP's ex goes to her house twice a week to walk the dogs and he also stays to watch them when OP is out of town

OP's ex goes to her house twice a week to walk the dogs and he also stays to watch them when OP is out of townu/lmps185

Legally, both of the dogs are OP's now

Legally, both of the dogs are OP's nowu/lmps185

She is getting tired of their current arrangement. Communicating and seeing her ex frequently has made it harder for her to move on. Should OP keep the dogs and ask her ex to stop contacting her?

She is getting tired of their current arrangement. Communicating and seeing her ex frequently has made it harder for her to move on. Should OP keep the dogs and ask her ex to stop contacting her?u/lmps185

Not to compare dogs to kids but this commenter makes a valid point. At this rate, OP's ex-BF is an absentee father.

Not to compare dogs to kids but this commenter makes a valid point. At this rate, OP's ex-BF is an absentee father.LelandHeron

OP needs to put her foot down and tell her ex to stop contacting her or she won't be able to moved forward with her life

OP needs to put her foot down and tell her ex to stop contacting her or she won't be able to moved forward with her lifeNinnyNoodles

Maybe he's hoping that they will eventually get back together but OP doesn't feel the same

Maybe he's hoping that they will eventually get back together but OP doesn't feel the sameLynda73

Or he could have at least chipped in with his dog's vet bills or pay for its food

Or he could have at least chipped in with his dog's vet bills or pay for its foodcats4life100, lmps185

OP has to make sure she has the paperwork to prove that the dog is now legally hers if she really plans on cutting contact with her ex. I have a feeling he won't let it happen easily.

OP has to make sure she has the paperwork to prove that the dog is now legally hers if she really plans on cutting contact with her ex. I have a feeling he won't let it happen easily.nw_white_mouse

Have they discussed how to sustain the current arrangement they have? This is unhealthy for either of them.

Have they discussed how to sustain the current arrangement they have? This is unhealthy for either of them.Jacqtjakaa

OP made it clear that she is planning on cutting ties with her ex but that could mean separating the dogs which is not the best idea for a bonded pair. OP's ex is being selfish if he insists on taking the dog despite knowing he has a better life with OP.

OP made it clear that she is planning on cutting ties with her ex but that could mean separating the dogs which is not the best idea for a bonded pair. OP's ex is being selfish if he insists on taking the dog despite knowing he has a better life with OP.lmps185

What exactly did he say when OP talked about keeping the dog and finally getting the clean breakup she needs

What exactly did he say when OP talked about keeping the dog and finally getting the clean breakup she needsmy80saddiction

From the looks of it, OP's ex will not take this news well. They can't even have an adult conversation without it resulting in a massive fight.

From the looks of it, OP's ex will not take this news well. They can't even have an adult conversation without it resulting in a massive fight.lmps185

Her ex probably knows deep down that his dog is better off with OP. He just doesn't want to accept it because it means he will lose any connection he has left with OP and the life they built.

However, OP has to do what's best for her. If she really feels like the two dogs are better off staying with each other, she has to find a legal way to deal with her ex because he will fight her to keep his dog.

Chelsi