15 Parents Discuss The Weirdest Thing That They Have Ever Caught Their Children Doing

Kids seem like a lot of work

Rachel

• Published in Funny
• October 15, 2020

I am not a person who has kids--I don't know if I will ever be one. I like kids, don't get me wrong, but I'm just not sure if they are for me.

I would like to know more people who have kids, however, I think I would be a cool aunt--but I just want to hand the child back to someone else at the end of the day. But then I read stories like this.

Kids bring so much love and joy to their parents' lives, no wonder people have them! As exhausting (and expensive) as they are, children are the cutest and funniest things to watch as they discover the world.

These parents shared the weirdest things that their kids have done, and it will be sure to have you laughing.

Such a kind gesture

[deleted]:

"When my son was about 4 he was playing in his playroom. I was on the couch and heard some sounds behind me (it was just us). So I turn and see my son looking up at the light fixtures and whispering. I ask what hes doing. His response: I'm asking all the lightbulbs in the house to not fall and kill you.

Thanks son! He's truly got my back"

He knows the secret to the universe

Bhavana1234:

"My son licked my toe. I asked him what he was doing, and he said “ time traveling.” He was three"

In fairness, we don't know that he is wrong

taikalainen:

"Found my kid talking to the hole in the sink when he was 2. Turns out that's where he said god lives. Carry on, ya weirdo."

Upgraded cinnamon challenge

DobbyIsMyHero:

"Few years ago the “cinnamon challenge” was a thing. Walked in the door to my son with his head under the kitchen faucet gulping and spitting water. He accidentally grabbed the cumin instead of the cinnamon."

Self care is important!

darkpixie1:

"When my son was about 3 years old, he liked to wash his eyebrows with my facial cleanser. Just the eyebrows. Wet, lather, rinse, repeat. He said it made them nice and soft."

They are wiener dogs

NinaBanina22:

"My boys share a room. They were about 2 and 7 at the time and I walked in their room and found them rocking on their hands and knees singing "we aaaaaaareeeee the weeeeeeeeeeeeiner doooogs".

I have no fucking idea."

Pretty funny, tbh

StuShepherd:

"Packing peas from our garden up her nose. This required a trip to the local hospital emergency room, where the doctor (a dad of several young children himself) thought it was hilariously funny. Soon my wife and I were laughing as well."

Gross, but cute

LaurenLumos:

"When my brother-in-law was three he was so obsessed with the toilet plunger they had to buy him his own so he’d stop grabbing the used one. It was his best friend."

...Kids are weird

cleoapollo:

"My 5 Yr old nephew went to feed the chickens yesterday, I told him to get a hat- he came back fully naked with gumboots and a straw hat on. Apparently the last time he went to the chicken house they pecked at his junk, and he wants to show them that it's not big enough to eat yet??? Kids are weird"

Children love to drink weird stuff

Gtrinker:

"Let's see, my daughter was drinking strawberry milk and then spitting it back into the cup so she could drink it again. I had hosed off a tarp and it was drying on the patio, we went outside and she just stooped down and took a drink out of a puddle on the tarp. just today I was in the garage and she came out, instantly grabbed a toothbrush I use to clean car parts and stuck it in her mouth. I don't even know anymore."

This is so cute!!!

rebekahah:

"My mom caught me bringing eggs from the kitchen into my room and sitting on them in a blanket nest, hoping they'd hatch.

What she didn't catch was that I had been doing this for a while and would put the eggs back into the fridge when they wouldn't hatch after a few days."

Just kids being kids

KiuDaso:

"When my daughter was little, old ladies would come over and enthusiastically ask her simple questions. Like "what's your name?" And she would always reply in flat monotone "Birth-day-Cake". Then they'd ask another question like "Oh, well, how old are you?" And she'd say "Birth-day-Cake". They would look over at us with great concern. So annoying."

Ecosystems are cool though!

MissMetalSix:

"I was the child. I was in my backyard and noticed there were a lot of slugs around since it had been raining. I was concerned that they had nowhere to go and they would be stuck outside where they would drown in the rain. So I went to the garage and got a bin and went around collecting every slug I could find. Then I got the idea to make it into a miniature city. I put in water, moss sticks, etc. and it became a project of mine that I maintained for weeks. Well one day my mom walks outside for whatever reason and finds me holding a bin that’s just FULL of slugs. She made me put them back and hose the bin down. I was pissed I lost all my hard work"

Classic gag

cranialdrain:

"I'm not a parent but my niece was very upset that her older sister wouldn't turn the TV over when I was babysitting once. After about 10 minutes she pretended to be interested in the washing machine that was on at the time and sat in front of it and watched it like a TV. For an hour and twenty minutes..... Her older sister watched the rest of her film but obviously wasn't enjoying it. She was outraged that her little sister was having a great time watching wet clothes spin round and round. It's the most creative act of revenge I've ever seen."

This is so sweet, but dangerous...

AngelFox1:

"When my son was 3 years old, we noticed the smell of burnt plastic coming from our heater vents. I called one of our friends that worked in heating and cooling and he came over. Our furnace was in our crawl space so he went down. About 15 minutes later, he asked me to hand him 3 black garbage bags through one of the vents so I did so. He came up later with 3 bags of plastic toys. I had wondered where all my sons toys were going.

I asked my son why he was putting toys down the vents. "he said mommy, there are alligators down there and if I don't feed them my toys, they will eat my sister.""

Seasoning is important!

dirtygreysocks:

"coating himself and the entire bathroom, in an entire, brand new, industrial sized garlic powder from costco."

Tell us the weirdest thing your kid has done in the comments!

Rachel