Man Rues Accommodating Mother's Request As Vacation Atmosphere Sours Due To Older Brother's Refusal To Hire Babysitter For Noisy Children

"I'm not the one dragging my kids to things they don't want to do"

Maryjane

• Published in Interesting
• September 21, 2023

You can completely feel like you're on vacation by bringing a babysitter with you on the family vacation. This gives you the freedom and assistance you need.

It provides you the freedom to visit kid-free attractions, experience nightlife, and take part in activities that are not feasible when you are taking care of small children. You can choose to go to an amusement park with an older child while a sitter looks after your newborn.

It can also enable you to divide your time between your children's needs and talents. If you don't explicitly define and explain expectations and ground rules, sharing space and your vacation time with someone who isn't a member of your family can be uncomfortable and disappointing. 

The OP had this under control as they rent a house somewhere every year for a spring break vacation. The OP, his wife, their four kids, and their kids' nanny. In the last few years, the OP has invited his mom and her brother Max, who is single.

The OP shared how they split their time with the kids so they could enjoy their vacation. OP's mom is well-off and passed that on to her kids, but OP's older brother, Jake, is not good with money.

OP's mom offered to pay his and his family's share of the entire trip so everyone could bond, but this turned out to be a bad idea as he refused to get a babysitter for his kids.

So now, the original poster is asking...

Bringing the nanny means they can split and get more one on one time with each adults

It becomes something where OP's mom has to choose between them and she hates that

OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the a-hole:

I might be because it's not my business how he raises his kids even if it's impacting my vacation.

And the comments roll in...

If they could handle their kids then there won't be cause for alarm

This redditor is curious to ask

This is a family vacation

This redditor is trying to explain what's happening in the story:

What's happening here is a set of parents who don't want to pay for child care but also don't want to take the child care in shifts on vacation and both of want to spend the vacation doing the same things they would if kids weren't in the mix, so they just do all the adult activities they want and bring the kids, making the kids and all other adults around them miserable.

OP's brother's style is to vacation with kids

The OP sounds like a great dad

This redditor doesn't see the problem

They should start taking their own vacation

OP's mom caused all this

Kids can be difficult to control, much less some stubborn adults. But a detailed plan that stated, "This is what's going to happen," would have resolved many of these problems.

It appears to have been cobbled together hurriedly, and now, it has turned the OP's holiday into a full-on ordeal, but it was still a worthwhile learning experience. The OP was declared not the AH, and that's a wrap!

Maryjane