Teen Uses Dissociation As Coping Mechanism During Family Turmoil, Parents Mistakenly Accuse Her Of Having Autism

"If I can't go somewhere physically, I guess the next best thing is to leave there mentally"

Damjan

• Published in Interesting
• October 30, 2023

Life is full of feelings, some happy and some sad. Some people have to deal with complicated relationships and situations that remind them of what it means to be human. Here's a story about a Reddit user who has found a special way to feel better when his family life is really tough.

OP doesn't have the happiest home life. Her dad and mom often engage in heated arguments due to her dad's infidelity. It's a mystery to her why they remain together.

During their frequent fights, she tends to mentally disconnect from the situation. She allows his gaze to blur, stops processing sounds and other sensory input, and retreats into his thoughts.

It's almost like an out-of-body experience, where she feels detached from his physical self as if she's floating through a vast void. Returning to full awareness takes time, like resurfacing from deep underwater. Everything said or done by others during this state appears distorted and delayed.

Despite how peculiar it may sound, this coping mechanism is what keeps her grounded amidst the turmoil. However, her parents seem to resent it. When they're upset with her, and she enters this mental state, they become furious, hurling insults and accusing her of having mental issues.

They've even gone so far as to tell their friends that she's autistic, a label he doesn't believe applies to her. While she acknowledges that his parents disapprove of his coping mechanism, she sees it as a necessary refuge from their constant turmoil. If she can't escape physically, retreating mentally is the next best thing for his well-being.

Amid a troubled family environment defined by parental infidelity and ongoing conflicts, OP wrestles with a deep feeling of detachment and disassociation.

OP recognizes the importance of her unique coping mechanism during difficult moments. However, his parents react negatively, expressing anger and concern about his mental well-being.

OP views mentally escaping from a challenging home environment as a necessary form of self-care

OP needs to reach out to a school authority immediately due to the abuse she is facing

OP could try to leave her unsafe household and find a safer place to stay.

This is about disassociation and depersonalization, which can have negative consequences.

OP needs to create a plan to leave the house and seek counseling for possible PTSD symptoms

Dissociation is a common reaction to emotional trauma or stress.

OP must start planning to move out soon and consider therapy to address the inevitable emotional damage.

OP could consider trying meditation or stress apps like Headspace

Disassociation is common.

OP can consider staying with a friend or relative for safety.

OP is facing a challenging situation at home, marked by the tumultuous relationship between her parents. Her coping mechanism of mentally disconnecting from the chaos is a lifeline for maintaining her sanity in a toxic environment.

While her parents may not understand or appreciate it, labeling her as "messed up" or autistic, it's crucial to recognize that people have different ways of dealing with adversity. Instead of condemning her for this coping mechanism, they should strive to address the root causes of their family's conflicts.

OP's well-being should be a top priority, and if escaping mentally is what keeps her going, then that's what matters most.

Damjan