People Share The Most Random Things They've Accidentally Found Out About Their Co-Workers

by Shasta

Sometimes humans word vomit. I'm sure maybe you've even done so before.

Especially when it comes to co-workers.

I mean, you do spend a significant portion of your life with them. So it's natural that you would grow into that comfort-ability and share things with those people.

Except, some people take it one step too far, and end up ultimately over-sharing. But what do you do when they suddenly leave your life forever?

Either you change positions, or they do. Or maybe one of you switched jobs all together.

Well, you could always start a Reddit thread, or you could just share your stories on an already existing one like this one,

u/lokicoyote who originally had the initial spark to ask,

“What’s the strangest, non-sexual thing you’ve ever learned about a co-worker?”

People are naturally curious, too!

1. Uh...

I worked at a record store in my early twenties. There was a guy about the same age maybe a bit younger then me. Really nice dude, he was always well dressed, blazer, khakis. The rest of us just wore jeans t-shirts. He always seemed slightly more professional then us.
I went to his house once after work. He lived with his mom, which was fairly normal for people I hung with as most of us were university kids. We were hanging in the piano room, he was showing me some songs he was working on. He went to get us drinks and came back with his in a sippy cup. Like a kids sippy cup. I asked why the hell was he using a sippy cup. He said he spilled a drink in the room the last week and now his mom makes him use a sippy cup. —poridgepants

2. Awwe!

I once asked a coworker if he had any big plans for the weekend and he said, “just getting ready for Presidents’ Day” I thought this was strange but upon further questioning it turns out that he and his son (kid was in first grade at the time) celebrate Presidents’ Day in the same way that my family and I celebrate Christmas. My coworker started this tradition because he and the kid’s mother have always split custody on major holidays so they have all these cute traditions surrounding Presidents’ Day instead.
Festivities include reading children’s books about the presidents/us history in the weeks leading up to the big event, brining out the “Presidents’ Day mattress” from storage and decorating it and then “Monty the Presidents’ Day moose” brings his son Presidents’ Day presents the morning of. I think it was one of the sweetest yet weirdest stories I’ve ever heard. Plus I imagine his son knows substantially more about US history than any of his peers. —hedgehoglady

3. Oh snap!

"In one of my jobs in high school my boss came in to work looking shell shocked. When I asked him what was wrong, he told me he had just learned that his biological parents were siblings. (He was adopted, and didn’t know his actual parents.) —BobbyBobRoberts

4. How would you even respond to this?!

"I had a co-worker that did 15 years in prison for murdering his wife. Super nice guy…Never would have known unless he told me. His daughter, (from the murdered wife) was one of my subordinates and they were actually close. Very strange deal." —WheezinThaJuice

5. Her what?!

"A female coworker had an Instagram account with over 40,000 followers… for her guinea pig." —Tree_Eyed_Crow

6. Well, good morning!

"My buddy paid a prostitute to clean his house naked. It would have been ok if he woke me up and told me before leaving for work. —baadboy1

7. Well, that's definitely a sad story.

"She was 25 and in medical school, so she was obviously a very responsible person. She also had a midnight curfew that was strictly enforced by her sister who was in law enforcement. Needless to say, when we talked about dating, she had never been on one." —cheezwiz62

8. That'll get you fired real quick.

"When he was 20 years younger he got slightly wasted with our king when he bar-hopped with him and a few friends. The king’s bodyguards didn’t notice that the king went to a different pub with them. After an hour or so, the bodyguards finally found them and barged in the pub in full panic mode. The king was enjoying his precious beer in the meantime. The guy is not a guy that makes up stories, so I believe him, especially in the way he told me. —fabales

9. That's pimpin', pimpin.

"I work in technology, a co-worker makes “pimp suits” that are bullet proof. —BelieveHIStory

10. I couldn't even imagine.

"One of the nicest people Ive ever worked with, I caught crying because it was the anniversary of when his father killed his mother in front of him when he was six. Very sad. —Whompman

11. I probably would've too!

"There’s this lady in dispatch who won close to $12,000 at a casino and then lost it again later that night. Walked out of SkyCity with seventy f—king dollars. Her husband nearly left her over it. —OmarGuard

12. I'd be speechless.

"I had this sweetheart 50-something coworker lady casually mention to me that she had been shot in the head. Turns out she was a badass biker chick in the 70’s and her meth-head boyfriend got drunk and shot her in the head one night."
"She kinda got teared up and said I was the first person she had told in like 30 years. Her biker name was roadrunner, and now she collects little knick-knacks in her cubicle and talks about her grandchildren all the time." —mgros483

13. I'd give that woman a high five.

"I found out that a coworker—an older lady, as in like 70—made most of her living writing extremely graphic erotic fiction under a pseudonym. It was amazing. —CorkyKribler

14. Believe it or not, this is not the first time I've heard of this kind of thing. Body builders will actually go out of their way to purchase breastmilk!

"One Man in his early twenties said he liked drinking milk from women not for any sexual thing, but because it had magical healing powers and would stop him from ever getting sick again. He even found a woman only 20 minutes away that liked the idea."
"Now I am not going to judge the guy if he said it was a kink. Everyone has kinks. The thing that was weird to me was he seemed to believe milk was magical and would keep him in perfect health all the time." —Windain

15. Well that's, interesting.

"A few of my coworkers and I were joking around with one of our other coworkers (who just came back from maternity-leave) about how often she’d pump at work — she nonchalantly said that the milk she was pumping was mostly for her husband to drink. Yeah…we never brought up that topic ever again.
Edit: To clarify, she pumps at least five times a day…almost always when the office starts getting busy, and every time, she proclaims “I’m going to go pump!” before she walks out the door — hence the lighthearted teasing." —will18057

16. A entire patent, huh?

"Man showed me a patent he had obtained for a sexual toy. I was impressed. —Ceilibeag

17. I'd be so shocked!

"That my straight-laced, clean cut, bespectacled, quiet and courteous coworker used to be hard into heroin, ran in a gang, and had a few assault charges. You would seriously never know. Gave off no vibes or had any mannerisms and had a polite face and cadence. He always wore a pressed long-sleeve dress shirt and a sharp tie. He never rolled up his sleeves even if it was hot and everyone else did."
"The reason I found out about this is one day I actually caught a glimpse of his arms which had two full tattoo sleeves. Taken aback, I asked him about them, and he told me the story. He was so curt about it, I didn’t believe he was making it up."
"I asked my other coworkers who had been there longer, and they said he apparently met his wife and turned his life completely around." —UptownShenanigans

18. Casual as all hell. LOL

"This guy told me he was standing with his back to the stove with the burners on for warmth. Then his shirt caught on fire and he got a burn. Then the next day he said he was sleeping on some cardboard and the pus broke and the cardboard was stuck to his back. It was the way he told me though, like it was completely normal sh—t."
“Hey dude, so I was leaning against my stove with the burners on, its nice and warm ya know? Then I caught my shirt on fire and got a big burn on my back. So I laid some cardboard down to sleep on, nice and comfy ya know? When I woke up the pus broke and I was stuck to the cardboard, cool right?”
"I don’t judge the guy it just kinda threw me through a loop. I hope he keeps enjoying his strange life and regales me with more of this bizzaro world stories."
"edit: ok pus not puss goddamnit. i guess i meant blister anyway but he mentioned pus several times. also when he said the thing about the cardboard it was more like “so you know I have my cardboard to sleep on, as people do you know”. i hope he isnt a redditor, im not trying to call him out or anything, to each his own and sh—t it was just some weird story. our job doesn’t pay that bad and its got benefits, myself i have a nice ass apartment and a bunch of hobbies, i dont know what the hell this guy is doing with his money or freetime. his story left me slightly disgusted, slightly perplexed, and oddly wanting to know more. he just came up and told me this out of the blue too, i know what its like to live alone, some crazy sh—t happened and he just had to tell someone i guess."—vaganaldistard

19. You have now been entered into an oath!

"There was a really tiny, adorable old man named Dina that would clean the floors and keep everything in order. He was the sweetest thing and was so nice to everyone. Basically the friendliest guy I’ve ever met."
"He had this weird rivalry/hatred for an equally tiny, equally old asian lady named Cha Cha. No one was sure why but they couldn’t stand each other. They would fight constantly and erupt into random screaming matches during the day."
"Many months later I saw the two of them shopping at Costco… holding hands. Turns out they were married and tried to put on a huge show so no one would find out. I’m not sure why- we didn’t have any rules about coworker relationships."
"Cha Cha gave me a handmade coupon for a free back massage in exchange for my silence." —-Nigel_Thornberry-