Dad Warns Son That Feminine Behavior And Female Friends Make Him Look Weak, Wonders Why He Is Mad

Fellas, is it effeminate to be a decent person?

Chelsi

• Published in Interesting
• May 11, 2024

Stop the search! The source of toxic masculinity has been found, and it was a disappointed father on Reddit.

OP complained that his 18-year-old son possessed too many woman-like qualities to find common ground with other men. We all know he used "woman-like" as an insult.

Even as a child, OP's son easily fit in with his female friends. Unfortunately for OP, his son is one of the two boys in his 9-person college friend group.

His son even considers his mom and his sister as his best friends. OP has deluded himself into believing that his son's predominantly female friendships were all coincidental because his first friend was a girl.

OP finds his son's choice of female friendships unconventional because his son is not gay. OP believes his female friendships stunted his son's social because he is too woman-like.

He says his son is too considerate, helpful, and too patient for a man. The disappointed father hoped his son's masculine traits would emerge once he learned to drive but was sorely mistaken.

His son shows no aggression on the road. OP was confused and let down when not even a shadow of road rage was displayed by his son.

OP finds comfort that his son has traditional masculine hobbies such as video games, tech, and cars. His son even wants to study engineering — the Gaston of college programs!

OP's hope that his son would develop male friendships when he went to college was dashed when most of his friends enrolled in the same college under the same or related programs.

His son somehow winded up becoming friends with all the girls in his course.

OP talked to his son about his manly observations and warned him how his friendships could impact his future. He said he would look like a weakling to other people. His son got upset.

OP said that wasn't his intention. He wanted his son to experience what it was like to "hang out with a group of bros." OP said he would be fine if his son changed how he acted or made new guy friends.

The bare minimum traits to be considered decent are too effeminate for OP. Yet he wonders if he is the a**hole.

The fervent hope of many commenters was for OP to just be trolling and rage-baiting. Unfortunately, men like him do exist and are raising children.

We can only guess the content of OP's reply. Based on the response, he didn't come across as enlightened.

How will aggression and indifference aid in his son's future? How will they advance his career?

First of all, is it a male elephant?

Being an obnoxious "alpha" does not equate to a great personality, OP.

OP didn't even consider that what upset his son was his dad's misogyny and the encouragement to be like him.

OP should amend his post's title to reflect the true nature of his question.

Whatever characteristics his wife modeled to their son and daughter worked. They are so far from who OP is and should be proud.

Did it hurt, OP? Did it hurt when you realized your son, at 18, was a better person than you would ever be?

This theory has to be true. OP's misogyny is the reason why his son has a limited amount of male friends.

That's a UNO reverse card theory. By displaying toxic "alpha" type behaviors, OP made his son more selective of the guys he allows himself to be friends with.

OP was his son's example of "how not to become a man." OP's account was suspended but not before he saw the comments calling him out for being a terrible dad and an outright objectionable person.

Chelsi