Teen Challenges Traditional Norms In Family Dispute, Asks Why Should They Respect Parents If They Don't Respect Them

"They replied by saying respect is earned. "

Damjan

• Published in Interesting
• January 17, 2024

Being a teenager can be tough, especially when you're not getting along with your parents. It's a time when you're figuring out who you are and sometimes, that means butting heads with mom and dad.

They're used to being in charge, and as a teen, you're starting to want more say in things. Here's a story about a 16-year-old guy who's having a rough time with his parents.

After finishing his exams, he hoped things at home would get better, but they didn't. They keep arguing, and there's a lot of stress.

The latest fight was right after a family event. OP told his parents they should respect him more, and maybe then he'd respect them.

They shot back saying respect needs to be earned. He replied that the same goes for them – just being parents doesn't automatically earn his respect.

The fight started over something small – using the computer. He wanted to use it to start working on his engineering course for college, but his parents said no without giving a reason, just because they said so. He feels like they don't respect him because they always pull the "we're the parents" card. He tries to respect them, but it's hard when they keep doing things like this.

OP is a 16-year-old who just finished his exams, and currently having a lot of arguments and stress with his parents.

OP recently argued with his parents and the key point is that OP expressed the idea that respect should be mutual and earned, rather than solely based on the parent-child relationship.

OP's parents believe that OP is the AH for communicating in such a manner with them.

OP asked to use a computer for his upcoming engineering course in September, but it was denied without a given reason, even though the computer was available.

OP often feels disrespected by his parents because they use their status as his parents to justify their actions and frequently undermine OP.

While gratitude is expected for what they've done, respect is earned.

It's important to give and receive respect mutually, and parents should respond based on the merits of the interaction rather than assuming respect automatically.

Parents expect respect but demand it without earning it.

OP's case is not alone.

If someone asks to borrow something and you decline, your decision should be respected.

It's a two-way street.

OP seems to be mistaking respect for entitlement.

Children have the right to ask for an explanation regarding their parents' decisions.

When parents and teenagers don't get along, it's because of respect issues. While we should be grateful for what our parents do for us, respect isn't just automatic.

It's something both sides need to earn by treating each other well. Parents can't demand respect just because they're parents.

They should earn it by how they behave. And it's the same for teenagers – they shouldn't feel entitled to respect without showing it in their actions.

It's perfectly okay for teenagers to ask their parents for the reasons behind their decisions. This helps everyone understand each other better and can lead to more respect in the family.

Damjan