Family Drama Ensues As New Dad Bars Parents From Baby Duties While Welcoming Help From In-Laws

Double standards or protective measures?

Jesse

• Published in Interesting
• August 31, 2023

Parenthood often comes with an influx of well-meaning advice and support from those around us. While parents generally appreciate the assistance and guidance offered by family and friends, there are times when the line between helpfulness and interference becomes blurred.

This dilemma takes center stage in the story of a young father wrestling with the challenge of establishing boundaries with his own parents.

Our narrator (OP), a 26-year-old father, finds himself in uncharted territory as he embarks on the journey of raising his first child alongside his wife. As an only child, he acknowledges their natural inclination to be overprotective yet grapples with his mother's difficulty in respecting his choices as an adult.

Having experienced her tendency to offer unsolicited advice throughout his upbringing, he is determined to assert his autonomy in his role as a parent. However, he admits to being more relaxed about taking parenting advice from his in-laws.

This, unfortunately, blows up in his face during a 4th of July barbecue, where both sets of grandparents converge for a joyful celebration.

Apparently, OP's parents were puzzled to observe the active involvement of his in-laws in the care of their grandchild. In fact, they watched as the in-laws did every single thing that they themselves were asked not to do.

This prompted them to drag OP aside and question why they were shut out while his in-laws were entrusted with helping out with parenting duties and even parenting advice.

At this point, OP felt guilty, as he realized that maybe he hadn't been fair to his parents in this regard.

Scroll down to find out how the story unfolds.

Let’s dig into the details

A bit of background

OP is fine with his in-laws offering advice on parenting, but won’t be taking any from his own parents

OP’s mom feels hurt that the other grandparent’s can help out, while she has been banned from doing so

Here’s how the Reddit community reacted to the story:

Sounds like OP’s mom is upset that the in-laws don't have the same boundaries as them

“NTA. Some people don’t know when to quit, so it’s best not to let them get started.“

“It sounds like you've tried to push her out of your kids life.”

“Your mom showed you she has a hard time respecting boundaries.”

“Mom can’t stay in her lane so mom can’t be closely involved.“

We wonder what OP’s wife’s opinion is on this matter

“Be kind to your mom but always choose your wife and kids feelings first.“

“NTA.From what you describe, your wife was busy and she called on her parents to lend a hand.”

The Reddit community is torn on this matter. While the majority agree that OP has the right to decide who can help parent his son, a few commenters have questioned why his parents have been shut out completely.

One commenter suggested that OP is probably scared that his mom might overstep her boundaries if she is given a chance. However, many have advised that OP should sit down with his parents to explain the situation better and maybe relax his boundaries.

We’d love to get your thoughts on this story. Join the conversation in the comments below.

Jesse