Mom Wants Teen To Move Back In After Kicking Her Out, But Daughter Refuses Because She Loves Living With Dad

"I have talked with her many times and explained my reasoning."

Damjan

• Published in Interesting
• August 3, 2023

Being a teenager comes with its own set of challenges, from school to social dynamics, and dealing with parents' divorce only compounds these complexities. For our 15-year-old protagonist, her life took a sharp turn when her mother asked her to leave their home due to regular arguments and an unclean room.

While this event may have been a distressing shift, it led to a discovery that living with her dad and stepmom was a more beneficial arrangement for her.

Divorce often means children must shuffle between two homes, yet sometimes one environment is more beneficial than the other. Our young protagonist found herself in this situation, choosing to live with her dad because of several factors.

Her decision was based on the close proximity to her school, sports practice, and friends; the nutritious meals her father provided; a cleaner living space; better rapport with her brother; and improved health. Additionally, she found that her relationship with her mother significantly improved with the decreased daily interaction.

However, this new arrangement met with resistance from her mother and extended family, who insisted she move back in with them. It's clear her mother misses her and is struggling to accept the change.

While her mother's feelings are understandable, it's also crucial to note that our protagonist's choice is not about spurning her mother but about prioritizing her own welfare and personal growth. Her reasoning goes beyond mere convenience; it's about building a more balanced and healthier life.

She has tried to explain her reasons to her mother, who seems momentarily accepting but later reverts to expressing her wish for her daughter's return. This repeated pattern suggests that her mother might be dealing with feelings of rejection or inadequacy, perhaps thinking she has failed as a parent because her daughter prefers living with her dad.

OP asks:

OP was kicked out by her mom because of the constant fights

It turned out great - OP enjoys living with her dad very much

However, her mom now wants her to move back in

OP doesn't want it...

OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the a-hole:

"Your mom kicked you out, so she can deal with the consequences."

What would keep her from kicking OP out again?

Mom wants money

OP stated many positive sides of living with her dad

Play stupid games, win stupid prizes

The bottom line is:

This teenager is absolutely not the 'asshole' for choosing to live with her dad. At the end of the day, her decision is based on what's best for her growth, health, and overall well-being, not out of malice toward her mom. It's a choice that shows maturity and thoughtfulness about her own needs.

While her mom's feelings of disappointment or rejection are understandable, it's important for her to remember that her daughter's decision isn't a rejection of her as a parent. In fact, their relationship seems to have improved since the change.

Instead of pressuring her daughter to return, it might be more beneficial to focus on maintaining the improved relationship and respecting her daughter's decision.

Damjan