Mother Uses Son's Disability As An Excuse Not To Discipline Him, Gets Angry When Others Do

"He’s a very clever and smart little boy."

Damjan

• Published in Interesting
• May 6, 2023

Parents of children with disabilities may be more lenient towards their children due to the challenges they face. They may feel guilty or responsible for their child's condition and try to compensate by being overly indulgent.

Additionally, parents may feel that their child has already faced significant challenges and want to avoid adding to their struggles by being too strict. It's natural for parents of children with disabilities to want to be more permissive, but it can cause conflict with family members who don't share the same approach to discipline.

Finding the right balance between accommodating the child's needs and enforcing healthy boundaries is crucial for fostering positive relationships and promoting their overall well-being. OP has a two-year-old nephew named Elliot, who has a condition that affects his sight.

Although Elliot is not blind, he cannot communicate how much he can see, making it difficult to understand his perspective. Elliot's mother, Amanda, often uses his condition as an excuse and does not enforce boundaries, despite Elliot being a clever and smart little boy.

One of Elliot's favorite activities is climbing up and down stairs. While this is not a problem in itself, it becomes frustrating for others when he blocks the way and refuses to move.

During a recent visit, Sasha, OP's daughter, had to move Elliot out of the way when he was blocking the stairs. However, Amanda became upset and believed that Sasha had no right to move her disabled son or talk to him in a certain way.

Sasha argued that Elliot's disability was irrelevant and that he understood her, but Amanda left the visit feeling upset. OP supported Sasha and refused to scold her, but their mother thought that Sasha was disrespectful.

On the other hand, Amanda is accusing OP and Sasha of being ableists. The situation has caused tension, and it's unclear if OP is the AITA in this scenario.

OPs nephew has a condition that affects his sight, and that is an excuse for OPs cousin to not discipline him

She thinks that my daughter does not show respect to her niece.

Sasha handled that situation perfectly

She deserves a reward, not punishment

Just letting a kid play on the stairs everywhere "because he likes it" is near negligent

Stairs are not meant to be used as a playground

There is no excuse for allowing a child to tyrannize every person around him

She avoids disciplining her own child but feels entitled to dictate how you should discipline yours.

If his sight is really that bad, he shouldn't be playing on the stairs.

She's putting him in danger by not helping him be more aware of his surroundings

The kids has sight problems, not hearing problems

He's going to have to learn how to navigate the world

Sasha did not show any signs of disrespect

It's important to note that parents of children with disabilities may face unique challenges and may struggle to find the right balance between accommodating their child's needs and enforcing boundaries. However, it's also important to recognize that all children, including those with disabilities, need structure and boundaries to thrive.

In this case, it's unclear if OP is the AITA, as different family members have different perspectives on what constitutes appropriate behavior. Moving forward, it may be helpful for all parties to have a frank and open discussion about their parenting philosophies and how they can work together to create a safe and healthy environment for Elliot and all family members.

Damjan