New Mother Chooses No-Contact With Narcissistic Father Who's More Interested In Brother's Name Change Than Her Delicate Pregnancy

She and her siblings don't have a great relationship with their father.

May

• Published in Interesting
• December 30, 2023

Some people might remember their dad always had a knack for turning every story into one about himself, or perhaps one who was a bit too invested in their achievements, whether in sports or school. These behaviors might be the stuff of "dad jokes" nowadays, but having a truly narcissistic dad is definitely no joke.

Narcissistic fathers are all about themselves – they're too absorbed and have too much admiration for themselves. They're willing to put their own needs above everyone else's, even their own kids.

Growing up with a narcissistic father can have a lasting impact, but it's important to know that setting boundaries can help protect against further harm. One Redditor, in particular, decided to go with the highest level of boundary-setting.

She went no-contact with her father. In an "Am I The A**hole?" (AITA) post, she details how her father reacted after hearing that her brother changed his last name.

The original poster (OP), who recently became a mom, found herself in a tough situation with her 58-year-old father. The tension within the family had always been present, especially between her dad and one of her five siblings, a brother with whom her father had a volatile relationship.

Last year, things reached a breaking point when the brother decided to change his name. Fast forward to the OP giving birth to her baby prematurely, undergoing an emergency C-section, and spending seven stressful weeks in the NICU.

Seeking support from her father, she texted him the news of his grandchild's arrival but received no response until the day after Christmas. To her dismay, the father didn't inquire about the baby's well-being or offer any support.

Instead, he wanted to discuss the brother's name change. The OP confronted her father, expressing her disappointment and promptly cutting off all contact.

The OP wanted to know if she was the a-hole for deciding to go no-contact with her father who never showed concern for her delicate pregnancy.

The OP tells the community about the relationship between his siblings and father. The relationship was so volatile, her brother decided to change his name.

She also had to undergo C-section. The baby had to come out 10-weeks earlier.

She texted her dad about what happened and only heard from him after Christmas.

But the father was more interested in the name change than her and her baby's condition.

A Redditor believes that the OP's dad is narcissistic. If she needed to cut him out of her life, then she should.

The OP was also called out for using an ableist slur

She's better off not having a father with that kind of attitude in her life.

More people are calling her out for using ableist slur.

One didn't even bother reading the post after seeing the word. They simply told the OP she's the a-hole for using the ableist slur.

One Redditor defended the OP, asserting that she wasn't using it in the context of ableism.

Another Redditor pointed out that the OP had to be educated about the word.

The OP has the power to keep her dad away from her and her child's life. If she feels the relationship is unhealthy and maintaining it will only lead to frustrations and disappointments, going no-contact is better for the sake of her mental health.

She does need to be careful with the words she uses, though. At least, the Redditors made her aware of the meaning behind the word she used in the post.

May