Protective Mom Finds Solace In Subreddit Dedicated To Unbearable Mothers-In-Law After Her Own Tried To Downplay Her Daughters' Multiple Academic Achievements

Who gets jealous over their own grandchildren's successes?

Chelsi

• Published in Interesting
• November 29, 2023

The default anonymity in Reddit makes it an ideal place to vent. A proud mama used it for that purpose after her mother-in-law tried to downplay one of her children's achievements.

OP and her husband decided to go low-contact with his parents. Their strict boundaries shielded them from his parents' less desirable qualities.

They thought a recent happy news was the best way to break the ice with his parents on Mother's Day. Their daughter just graduated high school and got a full-ride scholarship to a university.

OP's mother-in-law didn't share their enthusiasm for his granddaughter's achievements. She asked why their daughter didn't get an associate degree or why she didn't graduate early.

Her questions were clear attempts to undervalue her granddaughter's accomplishments. OP told her husband that his parents were no longer welcome in their home.

He gave his mother another chance to redeem herself by sharing about their youngest starting their postsecondary. His mom said, "We'll see how that goes."

OP knew her MIL compared her grandkids with each other. She was resentful that her older grandkids had fewer prospects than OP's children.

Her renewed dislike for her in-laws only grew after her husband received another message from his mom. They wanted to visit that weekend, which happened to be OP's birthday.

OP knew her MIL's plans weren't coincidental.

OP needed a space to air out her frustrations. She won't allow her in-laws to ruin their weekend plans.

She only wished they didn't have to deal with them at all. OP hated how her MIL spoke to her husband and their children. She wished her husband put his foot down with his parents.

OP couldn't fathom how her MIL could stomach playing favorites with her children and grandchildren. She didn't understand how she pitted her family against each other.

OP's MIL isn't the only one who plays favorites with her children and grandchildren. She might want to rethink that strategy because the future is bleak for someone like her.

Could it be that OP's MIL is jealous of her and her husband for raising such level-headed children?

I agree. OP should take it as a compliment that her in-laws do not approve of her children's aspirations.

I want to think that it's a healthy combination of jealousy, insecurity, narcissism, and good, old-fashioned misogyny.

Shouldn't they be bragging to their friends about how their grandchildren have bright futures ahead of them?

You can't hope for someone to change if they see no issue with their behavior.

As OP correctly pointed out, her husband should confront his parents. Their behavior towards their children could potentially damage their self-worth in the long run no matter how many milestones they rush past.

I believe OP is one disparaging remark away from cutting off her in-law's access to her family. If her husband is not ready to face how awful his parents had been to their children, then OP must do what she can to mitigate the damage before her kids carry that negativity in the next phase of their lives.

Chelsi