Teen Resents Mom For Abandoning Him When He Was Five, Treats Her Icily When Forced To Live With Her Family Even Though They All Try To Make Amends

Her son told her that he couldn't wait to turn 18 so he can move out and never see her again

Chelsi

• Published in Interesting
• November 8, 2023

An affair altered the relationship between mother and son even a decade later. When the OP was five years old, his mom had an affair with another man.

His mom left OP with his dad. OP barely saw his mom for two years, and she completely disappeared after that. Eventually, OP was also abandoned by his dad.

OP was convinced his father couldn't handle the responsibility of raising him alone or didn't want a reminder of OP's mom. He was sent to live with one of his maternal aunts.

OP was set to live with his paternal grandmother when his aunt died of cancer. To his surprise and dismay, his mom showed up to take him.

It was the first time in nine years that OP saw his mother. He felt awkward that she hugged and kissed him as if nothing happened.

She married her affair partner and had three kids together. Since living with them, OP spent most of his time in his room because he doesn't have much to do.

OP generally ignores his mom and her husband. They tried to include them in their family activities but OP didn't enjoy watching his mom play the perfect family when his childhood was the opposite.

His mom's husband tried to earn OP's affection. He learned that OP enjoyed tennis, so he got him tennis lessons and brought up going to a match.

OP hated how his mom's husband introduced him to his friends as his son. It happened when they ran into a friend of his at a grocery store.

He said that OP wasn't in any of their family pictures because he lived with a relative. When they got in the car, OP told him never to refer to himself as his father because he only knows him as a homewrecker.

OP's mom cried when her husband told her about what happened. OP said he couldn't wait to turn 18 to leave and never see their family again.

OP locked himself in his room and ignored them when they tried to talk to him.

OP hasn't had stability since he was five years old. His pent-up anger is more than justified.

Unfortunately, OP can no longer live with his grandmother

Could his mom's affair partner be OP's biological father? OP didn't want to think about it, and, to him, that made their situation even worse.

OP reiterated in another comment that he has no interest in finding out the truth about his paternity

If his mom's affair partner was his bio-dad, then OP's father is also in the dark

OP posted an update. His mom and her husband have been apologetic to him. They proposed to go to family counseling instead of the solo therapy OP wanted.

OP agreed but would tell the therapist he wanted a solo session. It's sneaky, but it is the only way he could get the help he needs.

OP shared an update six months after his original post. His mom's husband bought him a car for his 17th birthday and proposed to adopt him.

OP feels sorry for them sometimes because he knows they are trying hard to connect with him. He and his mom are more amicable, but OP still doesn't trust her.

He committed to going to therapy and has been better for it. He will continue living with his mom and try to make her husband pay for his college education.

OP is basically in survival mode. He is keeping his head down to keep the peace until he is old enough to move out and make decisions for himself.

It's clear that OP is more resentful of his mother than he is of his father. He will eventually realize that they both failed him, not just his mom.

Chelsi