17 Quotes That Show Cameron Tucker Is The Sassiest Character From Modern Family

"You made figure skating sound even gayer."

Chelsi

• Published in Film & TV
• July 5, 2022

Modern Family is a comfy show loved by many. Consisting of characters that are naturally witty, it’s easy to relate to the dynamic of the Pritchett family and their everyday lives.

For many, it’s like seeing your own family antics through someone else’s lenses, only funnier. At least you’re not the one trying to solve their problems and only part of the audience watching them get through. 

Like hanging out with your own group of favorite cousins, you couldn’t help but love the interactions between all of them, given how they have their own shining personalities. From Phil’s unfiltered thoughts that would make you do a double-take to Gloria’s fast rants, it’ll all lift your spirits. 

Let’s not forget the sassiest out of the bunch, Cameron Tucker. You might know him as coach Tucker or Lily’s stylist when she was a baby but he’s been known to have more than a few comebacks with his own family being the receiving end of them.

You dare not mess with him if you don’t want to get a slap on the wrist with farm-references-filled comebacks or regular ones that would probably make you wonder where he pulls them out of. Nevertheless, Cam is a lovable guy, he is sincere as much as he is sassy and the whole family wouldn’t have it anyway.

1. "I'll put on a polo and a pair of khakis and maybe people will think we're just a couple of golf buddies who decided to have a kid together."

2. "You made figure skating sound even gayer."

Mitchell: "Just the emerald city at the end of my yellow brick road."

Cameron: "Wow you did it."

Mitchell: "What?"

Cameron: "You made figure skating sound even gayer."

3. "t's Valentine's Day. It's not the day you run away from love. It's the day you chase it down."

4. "It's where the planet geek passes through the nerdy way."

Mitchell: "Tonight is the magnificent Lyrid meteor shower."

Cameron: "It's where the planet geek passes through the nerdy way." 

5. "I couldn't take that chance. I wanted to get off on the right foot."

Mitchell: "To us, alone at last."

Cameron: "We both look very handsome tonight."

Mitchell: "You know, if you- If you'd just said that I looked handsome, I would have said, So do you."

Cameron: I couldn't take that chance. I wanted to get off on the right foot.  

6. "There are dreamers and there are realists in this world. You'd think the dreamers would find the dreamers and the realists would find the realists, but more often than not, the opposite is true. You see, the dreamers need the realists to keep them from soaring too close to the sun. And the realists... Well, without the dreamers, they might not ever get off the ground."

7. "I don't think workmen really call them outfits."

Mitchell: "Aren't you going to change into a working man's outfit?"

Cameron: "I don't think workmen really call them outfits."

8. "Yes, I've gained a few extra pounds while we were expecting the baby... but that's science. You can't fight it."

9. "She doesn't have the dexterity for that!"

Mitchell: "She wants us to buy Lily a Blackberry."

Cam: "She doesn't have the dexterity for that!"

10. "Really, Mitchell? The worst Halloween ever? You had squeaky thighs; I lost a childhood."

11. "Yeah, because I was a growing boy and they were chock-full of protein. But it was still heartbreaking."

Mitchell: "No, the lengths that we're going to for a stuffed animal. You know, Cam, maybe it's time Lily learned about loss."

Cameron: "No, she's 3, and I know. Do you know how many times I had to say goodbye to a furry friend on the farm?"

Mitchell: "And didn't it make you stronger?"

Cameron: "Yeah, because I was a growing boy and they were chock-full of protein. But it was still heartbreaking." 

12. "You do know what stranger means, don't you?"

13. "Were you there?"

Mitchell: "When did we decide that Lily could go to Disneyland? I thought we were gonna talk about this."

Cameron: "She's missing one day of school. I missed half of the fifth grade because of a pig bite, and I'm just as educated as anyone else."

Mitchell: "Really? When we met, you thought you grew up in Central America."

Cameron: "Missouri is in the center of America."

Mitchell: "Okay. You also thought that the cavemen killed the dinosaurs."

Cameron: "Were you there?"

14. "That's a lot of complaining for somebody who asked for thirds of our tandoori turkey last year."

15. "Then we figured, they're already mean enough, can you imagine one of them pregnant? No, thank you."

Mitchell: [aside to camera] "We have been together for, uh, five years now? And we decided we really wanted to have a baby so, we initially asked one of our lesbian friends to be a surrogate-"

Cameron: "Then we figured, they're already mean enough, can you imagine one of them pregnant? No, thank you."

16. "We never needed fake I.D.s on the farm. We figured if a 16-year-old could drive a tractor, he could drink a beer. Not at the same time, of course. It's Missouri, not Texas."

17. "Tell that to the cow-shaped hole in my bedroom wall."

Mitchell: [aside to camera] "Lily lost her first tooth today. And she's very excited about a visit from the tooth fairy."

Cameron: "When I had my first loose tooth, my mama tied one end of the string to it, and the other to the tail of a Guernsey cow, fired off a 12-gauge shotgun, and the cow went running out of the room."

Mitchell: "That never happened."

Cameron: "Tell that to the cow-shaped hole in my bedroom wall."

Whether he's dressing up Lilly for another photoshoot or screaming at a bunch of school kids because they can't score a point in a game of football, Cam is definitely memorable. He keeps things interesting and is not afraid to say when he wants something.

He plays off well with the rest of the family. Not to mention he's naturally funny, even without his Fizbo get-up.

Chelsi