Man Fails Miserably At Cultural Etiquette During Dinner With Girlfriend’s Korean Parents

According to this boyfriend, Korean culture can get a little exhausting.

Jesse

• Published in Interesting
• May 15, 2024

In the riveting world of cross-cultural romance, nothing spells adventure quite like diving into the deep end of your partner’s side of the globe all in a bid to impress the parents. Sounds nerve-wracking right? Our narrator (Original Poster) thought the same. 

OP’s girlfriend was Korean, and their cultural quirks were as thick as a Harry Potter novel. The goal was mastering the art of polite refusal—a common Korean practice, especially when it came to paying the bill. 

“Refuse at least five times before accepting," his girlfriend’s warnings echoed. OP thought this was crazy, but he was determined to win them over. 

So, with the enthusiasm of a student cramming for finals, OP tackled his girlfriend’s cultural briefings as if it were the GRE. When the D-day arrived, he believed he was ready.

He ventured into the evening, ready to decline any offer with grace and precision, but the merry-making was enough to make anyone forget their tactical training in Korean politeness. 

When the offer to stay the night was thrown at him, a slightly tipsy OP forgot his mandatory five refusals and accepted eagerly. The next day, his girlfriend pointed out how her parents weren’t thrilled about the impromptu sleepover. 

Confused and a tad frustrated, OP questioned why they asked in the first place if they expected him to decline. Her defense? The cultural equivalent of "That's just how we roll."

Well, to OP, it seemed unnecessarily exhausting. He vowed to bypass the pretense in the future and turn down any offer regardless. 

Did this newfound resolve automatically make him a rude dude like his girlfriend claimed?

The story in detail

A bit of background

OP was drunk and got offered their guest room to pass the night, which he accepted graciously

OP’s girlfriend later revealed that even tho her parents liked him, they were put off by the fact that he accepted to stay over

OP resolved to turn down any future offers from her parents to avoid any more conflicts

We gathered some interesting reactions for your viewing pleasure:

“Very bold of you to drink that much the first time you met the parents.”

“YTA, not for staying the night,  but because you called it posturing when it's just part of Asian culture.”

“YTA. You don’t care enough or respect your girlfriend to respect her cultural traditions as silly as they seem to you.”

“NTA but if you want to be with her, you’re going to have to learn how to deal with cultural differences.“

“YTA for your disrespect of their culture. And your insincerity.”

“I’m not Korean but that ‘decline 5 times’ shit is super weird and would seem like a headache for anyone who isn’t Korean.”

Redditors had a mixed bag of opinions regarding OP's predicament. Some empathized with OP, understanding the cultural differences at play. A few even criticized his girlfriend's lack of support as he was in unfamiliar terrain, after all.

The consensus: Cultural expectations can be tricky but communication and mutual understanding are key. And hey, if all else fails, blame it on the soju!

What do you think about this story? Let us know in the comments.

Jesse