Breadwinner Wants To Know If She'll Be the AH If She Refuses To Pay Off Her Husband's Recurring Debts

"I have paid off his debt multiple times in the past"

Maryjane

• Published in Interesting
• May 14, 2024

When it comes to our finances, we want a steady income and no outstanding debt. After all, having excessive debt can lead to bankruptcy and have a negative impact on one's mental well-being.

We can have the pleasures we desire today, all thanks to credit cards, but we will have to bear the weight of paying off the debt much later. A person who uses a credit card is given access to debt, which enables them to make purchases greater than their actual income or available resources.

This enables a person to purchase goods over a longer period of time and pay the minimum amount each month. This eventually adds up when more and more credit purchases are made and the deadline for fully repaying the debt is extended.

Credit card debt accrues interest at a progressive rate. So, the total debt is increased not only by more purchases but also by interest and other costs.

The OP is the breadwinner, and since she works from home, she also manages the majority of the household and kids  stuff. The OP is also doing her graduate studies, and she's overwhelmed.

Her husband, on the other hand, has a business that isn't doing so well. On top of that, the OP is always bailing him out financially.

He has over 10k in credit card debt, and the OP isn't willing to bail him out this time.

The OP writes

And the story kicks off...

OP never got to do home renovations because all her bonus money just goes to his business

OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the a-hole:

1. Not paying off my husband's debt. 2. AITA if I don't help my husband even though I can and spend it somewhere else?

And the comments roll in, in their hundreds

His irresponsibility could potentially hurt the children's future

He committed a couple of serious breaches

Don't let his business take you down

The OP left this in the comments

This is technically my debt. That's why I paid off a few times. We had assets together but his personal debt is in his own name. My credit is squeaky clean, for now. I still love him. He is a great person, great father and husband.

Being a nice person, his clients exploit his kindness 😞 and also his poor spending habits!!! The moment he has money, he itches to buy something. Maybe he needs therapy for being a chronic shopper! I don't know if the guy can be a shopaholic!

It's not a business

Getting out

Stop bailing him out

Getting a live in housekeeper

It is a hobby

The husband's "business" is ruining the family, so he needs to stop talking and find work! Some Redditors say that "business" is in fact a costly hobby that gives him the ability to feel like a big boy and boast that he runs his own company.

Many Redditors adviced the OP to give up on bailing him as he needs to work it out and get a paying job. In the end, the OP was declared not the AH.

Maryjane