Well-Meaning Meddler Triggers Holiday Conflict By Convincing Fiancée To Have Christmas Lunch With Her Toxic Family

When good intentions spark a festive family feud.

Jesse

• Published in Interesting
• November 20, 2023

Our narrator (Original Poster) shared a past with his fiancee that traced back to the same elementary school. Their paths realigned during college, and this led to four blissful years of dating.

However, OP noticed something was off between his fiancée and her family. Not once did she visit them in all this time. Whenever she did mention them, she took on a somber tone.

She had this routine of trashing their invitation each Christmas, but this time, OP decided to take matters into his own hands. This year’s letter revealed her grandmother was in a dire situation—it might be her last Christmas!

OP convinced his fiancée to spend Christmas with her ‘dying’ grandmother. After some back and forth, she reluctantly caved in. Things went so great initially, that OP couldn’t help but wonder why she shut such lovely people out. 

Well, the merry atmosphere quickly turned sour on Christmas morning when OP’s parents arrived. His fiancée’s cheerful demeanor immediately took a nosedive.

The lunch showdown began as her parents launched a barrage of passive-aggressive comments, targeting everything from her hair to her job. OP aggressively fired back, turning the gathering into a tense, silent battleground.

Things reached a boiling point, and OP's fiancée stormed out in tears. He trailed closely behind, attempting to calm her down. 

She accused him of meddling in her family affairs, and despite his efforts to salvage the lunch, drove off in anger. OP returned to the table, where everyone pretended nothing happened.

He returned to an empty house and a note urging him to remain with her family since he chose them over her. How can OP fix this mess?

The story in detail

A little background

OP had lunch with his fiancée’s family on Christmas, but it ended badly as they were making underhand passive aggressive comments about everything

OP’s fiancée ended getting hurt. Now he knows why she has avoided her family all this while

Here’s how the Reddit community reacted to the story:

“YTA… Even if you are only trying to help her, you have to talk to her instead of deciding what's best and doing it.”

“You are doing exactly what her family did to her. Disrespecting her feelings and watching her be treated poorly.”

“YTA. Apologize to your fiancée.“

“YTA… Why would you want to force someone you claim to love to stay in a situation that made them cry?”

“You think of yourself as the decision maker, the one who knows best and honestly that is a problem.“

“YTA - I would 100% end the engagement over this. The level of disrespect you’ve shown her is absolutely staggering.”

“You knew her feelings, then went behind her back, ignored them, and pressured her.”

“YTA. She was NC for a reason. It's not your job as her fiancee to ‘fix’ her situation.”

Important edit

Redditors call OP out for dragging her into a mess she spent years avoiding. 

Even if he was only trying to help her, he had no right to decide what was best for her. Not everything ended happily ever after.

Thankfully, OP was given another chance. He respects her decision to make no contact with them, and her family is definitely NOT invited to the wedding.

What do you think about this story? Let us know in the comments.

Jesse