Woman Agrees To Move To Partner's Home Country And Contemplates Financing His Dream House, Redditors Warn Her It Could Be A Scam

He said they needed to combine finances and build a home before he can even think about having kids with her.

Chelsi

• Published in Interesting
• December 17, 2023

It isn't easy to understand all of the complexities of a relationship based on one online post. They offer nothing but a snapshot of a moment, after all.

After reading a 37-year-old's description of her relationship, some Redditors were convinced it was a scam. OP and her 31-year-old partner have been together for three years.

They live overseas, away from their home countries. OP's partner moved back home while she stayed to see through the end of her work contract.

They agreed to permanently reside in her boyfriend's home country and start their family. The first thing her partner did when he moved home was to buy a property to build his dream house.

OP raised her concerns and told her partner that she should get an equal say in planning their future home. Her partner objected because building and designing his dream home had been his lifelong dream.

He didn't want OP's input or money with this project. OP was upset by her partner's decision, but she respected it.

She decided to save for her own home in the future. A few months later, as OP was about to move to her partner's home country, he informed her they needed to combine their finances and share ownership of their home before they started their family.

He wanted to use OP's savings to build his dream house. He said he wouldn't have children with her unless she agreed to his terms.

When OP asked to be a part of the decision-making for their house, he said she couldn't change anything because the plans were already final.

OP refused. She proposed that they purchase a property together in the future as equal partners.

Her partner got upset. He refused to accept her decision and said she should forget that he stopped her from having a say in the construction of his dream house. He asked OP for space to think things through.

OP explained a few more things that confused some Redditors.

Redditors were quick to spot the troubling aspects of OP's relationship.

They said it reeked of a scam to siphon every penny OP has.

Someone who uses children as a bargaining chip for emotional blackmail isn't a person fit to be a good parent.

It's telling that a scam is the best-case scenario.

What does OP get out of this relationship other than the flimsy promise of future children?

The fact that he got upset when OP refused to accept the conditions he gave her should be enough to make OP question her commitment to this person.

He didn't even consider OP's stability. She was about to move to a new country without a job. That was the worst possible time for her to deplete her savings.

It does seem like her partner is trying to ease OP into a controlling relationship.

What guarantee does OP have that this man will hold up his end of the bargain once she transfers her life's savings to him?

This relationship could be a lot of things — controlling, one-sided, abusive, or a long con. One thing is certain: it is not a good relationship for OP.

It is undeniably a beneficial relationship for her partner. He is getting a house out of the whole ordeal if OP didn't wise up.

Chelsi