Boyfriend Upsets His Girlfriend By Preparing A Personalized Gift For His Best Friend's Birthday When He Regularly Just Gets Her Gift Cards

"Like…just try."

Chelsi

• Published in Interesting
• May 4, 2023

You know a Reddit post is about to be interesting when the question is, "Am I the a**hole for using 'weaponized incompetence' when getting gifts for my girlfriend?" The OP claims that he has never been good at gift-giving.

He bought maybe two or three gifts in his lifetime that were considered thoughtful by their recipients. He gets by with gifting people with gift cards during the Holidays and special occasions.

He had a stroke of genius when he was thinking of a present for his best friend's birthday. OP's best friend spends most of his time traveling, learning about history, and studying.

He spent most of last year finishing his dissertation which he is hoping to turn into a book. OP has seen and proofread several draft versions of this dissertation as a favor.

He knows it is nearly complete and asked his best friend for a copy. As a gift, he had two copies made and bound.

He then wrote an "About the Author," section as a personal touch. During the party, he told his best friend that the first copy is his while the second one will be the first autographed version for OP to keep.

It was a touching moment for them and his best friend's family to witness. His best friend even teared up when he read what OP wrote on the "About the Author" page.

OP's girflriend was there thw whole time and kept quiet for the most part

She went home early while OP stayed overnight with his friend

He talked to his girlfriend the following day

She said his gift to his best friend was an overkill

She added that it was proof that OP was using "weaponized incompetence" to excuse his generic gifts to her in the past

If you were in his girlfriend's place, would you also feel hurt by OP's atypical burst of thoughtfulness?

Some commenters countered that there are people who really aren't easy to shop for

The thing about OP is he admitted that he doesn't really give a thought to the presents he buys. Given that they are mostly gift cars, you can see why his GF is upset.

From what OP said, he has given maybe two or three thoughtful gifts. Maybe his luck just hasn't landed on his GF yet.

OP can take this suggestion and slowly earn his way back into his GF's good graces

We need examples of what gifts OP has bought his GF in the past, so we can understand better why she was so incensed by his thoughtful gift for his friend

Yeah, OP has no one to blame but himself

I say this with all the kindness I can muster, please try OP

OP did a great job at picking his friend's gift, his opening paragraph was really just a flimsy excuse why he doesn't buy his GF thoughtful presents

Just actively listening to the things she says in passing will make him a better gift-giver

OP has shown his girlfriend that he is capable of giving a damn when he reveals the thoughtful present he prepared for his best friend. It showed her that he was coasting by and barely trying with his past gifts to her.

OP made his best friend feel special while it showed his girlfriend he's been getting away with the bare minimum for however long they have been together. OP can start listening from now on to prove to his girlfriend that he is capable of thoughtfulness.

Chelsi