27 Y.O. Makes New Friend And Scares Her Away When She Throws Adult-Sized Tantrum Over Forgetting Her Birthday

"Man, I’m exhausted just reading this."

Chelsi

• Published in Interesting
• May 10, 2024

A 27-year-old made a new friend six months ago. She and Ashley were fast friends and were especially close during the first three months of their friendship.

Their new relationship plateaued when OP moved to another country. They still talk and play video games online when time permits.

Their friendship hit another speed bump when Ashley forgot OP's birthday. OP explained that she had mentioned when her birthday was in passing but didn't remind Ashley of the date.

OP understood how easy it was to forget a birthday but was still hurt by what happened. Some of OP's other friends also forgot her birthday, so Ashley's oversight intensified her loneliness.

OP reminded Ashley when her birthdate was. Ashley wished her a happy birthday and said OP should have told her.

A few days later, Ashley reached out to acknowledge how tense their relationship was. OP said she wished Ashley apologized when she realized she had forgotten her birthday.

OP mentioned how she makes it a point to remember her friends' birthdays and sends them well wishes. They argued until Ashley said she wouldn't apologize for not meeting an expectation she didn't know existed.

OP's sentiment was that Ashley should have apologized when she realized she had unintentionally hurt her feelings. She told Ashley it was a kindness to show remorse even when you didn't mean to hurt another person's feelings as it showed consideration and care.

Ashley repeated that she wouldn't apologize to OP.

OP said Ashley broke her trust and that she no longer felt comfortable opening up to her.

When OP had a chance to calm down, she considered that she might have overreacted.

Would it have been better for OP to accept that Ashley will never apologize for what happened?

Or is OP's disappointment over her birthday being forgotten by her new friend justified?

OP placed an unfair expectation on a new friend without telling her and got mad when she didn't measure up to the task. OP is a lot of work.

At 27, surely OP understands that people have their lives to live. Right?

Ashley's effort to remain in contact with her since she moved should have meant more than a missed birthday greeting.

Wasn't it odd how OP accused Ashley of breaking her trust when she refused to apologize for missing her birthday? What does that have anything to do with trust?

Are you a great friend to Ashley, OP? Why are you so determined to make a mountain out of a molehill?

I can't imagine what other issues they tackled during their hours-long, intense conversation about a missed birthday greeting.

Is it really a friendship-breaking mistake to forget the birthday of someone you've known for six months?

If OP wanted to feel special on her birthday, she is old enough to plan those things herself.

All this drama from someone you've known for six months? OP would have thrown a bigger tantrum if she and Ashley still lived in the same country.

Well, they reconciled. Do you think OP would be so kind as to share the poem Ashley plans to write for her?

OP's attachment issues aside, what did we just read? A 27-year-old woman was so butthurt over a new friend forgetting a birthday she mentioned once that she poured her heart out online for the world to see.

Is this the kind of oversharing that feels cathartic but once you're done, you regret it completely? Well, whatever it is, Ashley will never, ever forget another one of OP's birthdays.

Chelsi