Man Under Fire For Telling Son That He Has Retired From Parenting And Won't Be An Active Grandparent To His 5-Year-Old Child

"I want to explore my hobbies and do all the things I didn't get to do in my 20s."

Jesse

• Published in Interesting
• August 10, 2023

Parenting is a journey that demands an unwavering commitment that often transcends personal desires and aspirations. This reality becomes even more complex for those who never envisioned themselves as parents in the first place.

Raising a child comes with sleepless nights, patience, and selflessness, traits that don't always come naturally. Yet, once a child enters the world, it becomes the parent's responsibility to nurture and guide them, regardless of personal inclinations.

This obligation doesn't come with an expiration date, and all parents must remain steadfast even as the child matures into an adult. The story of a father (OP) and his son, Jake, captures the essence of this.

OP explained that he never wanted to be a parent, yet when life led him down that path, he shouldered the mantle with a sense of duty. The relationship with Jake's mother was short-lived, characterized by an accidental pregnancy, leading to a strained connection between the two.

Despite his reservations, he remained devoted to his role as a father, investing time and effort into raising Jake.

As years passed, the dynamics shifted when Jake became a father at 21. Unlike OP, Jake embraced fatherhood wholeheartedly, benefiting from a more stable foundation and family support.

Reflecting on his own journey, OP candidly advised Jake on the challenges and responsibilities of parenting. He also informed Jake that he was retired from active parenting and would prefer to focus on enjoying life to the fullest.

This decision stirred conflicts within their relationship, as Jake saw OP's decision as a way to keep his grandson as far away as possible.

A pivotal moment came during a baseball tournament for Jake's son, where OP declined to attend in favor of scuba diving with his girlfriend. This refusal triggered a confrontation between father and son, bringing to the fore years of accumulated emotions and differing viewpoints on parenting.

Scroll down to find out the full details of the story.

The story in detail

A little background

OP made it clear to his son (Jake) that he won't be an active grandparent, but would only turn up during emergencies

OP has been focused on living his life to the fullest, but Jake is upset that he doesn't make time for his grandson

Here's how the Reddit community reacted to the story:

"You might not be TA, but you’re ruining your relationship with your son."

"Your actions will have consequences, but only time will tell if you regret your actions or not."

"YTA...I'm so sorry how resentful you are of your son."

"You are a pretty terrible father now. Parenthood isn't a job that you retire from."

"Being a parent never stops my dude."

"Just tell your kid you hate him and want nothing to do with him and his kid."

"YTA and I hope you learn before it’s too late to fix your relationship with your son."

"You only took on more 'parenting work' after his mother remarried."

"YTA. You're holding your son accountable for you having to be his father."

OP has been declared the ultimate a**hole in this story. The commenters have accused him of being a terrible father for even mentioning to his son that he has retired from parenting.

As one Redditor mentioned, OP only catered to Jake for 70 days a year throughout his childhood. That's not a "sacrifice" worth bragging about.

Hopefully, OP retraces his steps before it's too late to mend things with his son.

We'd love to get your thoughts on this story. Join the conversation in the comments.

Jesse