Father Finally Finds Peace After Deciding Not To Walk His Estranged "Daughter" Down The Aisle

She said he should stop parenting her after learning he wasn't her biological father

Chelsi

• Published in Interesting
• April 1, 2022

Weddings are typically joyous occasions that you would want to share with loved ones. You want to be around people who have truly supported and cared for you for as long as you can remember.

What happens then if someone who is no longer a part of your life suddenly calls you and asks you to walk them down the aisle? Would you grant their request even if you have no relationship to speak of?

A father was torn by this very question as he shared on Reddit. He and his 26-year-old daughter have not spoken in years.

When she was 15, they found out that her mom had cheated on OP and she wasn't his biological daughter. Apparently, the biological father now wants to be a part of the daughter's life.

OP and her wife divorced and he told his daughter that he still loves her no matter what. She wanted to form a bond with her biological father and while it hurt OP deeply, he had to accept it.

Their relationship started to get strained after that. OP tried to maintain their relationship but his daughter was no longer interested in spending time with him.

When she was 20 years old, their relationship reached its untimely end. She was living in OP's house but they were arguing because she had dropped out of her college courses and refused to do anything for 3 months.

She was also mad at OP because he told her she needed to go back to school or work if she wanted to live at OP's house for free. She retaliated by saying he wasn't her real dad and OP should stop pretending because she can just go live with her real father which she did.

This turn of events left OP with a broken heart.

OP drank a lot just to cope with the pain for years, if not for his son, he wouldn't have survived. He tried to reconnect with his daughter years later but she wanted nothing to do with OP.

Accepting her choice gave OP some semblance of peace while his son refused to talk to his sister because he was so mad at her. Despite the rift, OP's son and his ex's daughter still chat sometimes.

Through his son, OP learned that the daughter's biological father passed away and she was also apparently engaged. Suddenly, she made contact with OP.

She said she knows they haven't talked in a while but she was wondering if OP was willing to walk her down the aisle. OP replied with a relatively long message detailing how she had hurt him in the past, he said no.

He said the moment she told him she didn't want him as a father, he had to learn not to consider her as a daughter. Then, they started arguing because she said it was not her fault she wanted to meet her real father.

OP agreed that it wasn't her fault but how she treated OP afterward was her burden to carry. OP knows deep down that if her biological father didn't die, they wouldn't even be talking.

He wished her a happy wedding but repeated he wanted no part of it or her life. She is telling this story to the rest of the family to make OP look bad.

OP's brothers think he was wrong because this could be an opportunity for them to mend their relationship but OP said he's not interested. Read the full post below for more information:

"I was depressed for a very long time."

"But I have no interest in that."

The verdict is OP is not the a**hole

When asked why OP's son can't walk his sister down the aisle, here's what OP had to say

It would make more sense if her mom was the one to walk her down the aisle

Her choices as an adult are hers alone but so are the consequences

She only wants OP to be there for optics

OP respected her wished before but she can't respect his decision now?

This is a likely scenario; she could be trying to save face.

If OP attends the wedding, would she even maintain a relationship after she got what she needed from him?

Based on her previous actions, OP is not far off with this gut feeling

She considers OP as a back up dad maybe

After a while, OP wrote an update after receiving judgment and advice from Reddit

You can read the full update below:

They were proud that OP was able to communicate his feelings to his brother and for the way he ended the relationship with his ex's daughter

OP is also glad about the recent positive developments

It's really all we wish for OP

Fortunately, he seems to be working toward that peace himself

Families do not come as advertised; they are complex and full of complicated individuals. The idea that love should be unconditional is optimistic but realistically speaking, love does have conditions.

You can't force a relationship with someone, real daughter or not if they are unreceptive. OP had to learn this the hard way but he worked for it and finally found peace.

We do not know everything that transpired in their relationship but we have to respect OP's choice to cut ties with his ex's daughter. Like him, we wish her a long and happy marriage without OP's participation.

Chelsi