Boyfriend's Hurtful Comments On Girlfriend's Slight Weight Gain Spark Outrage

“My boyfriend has always made ‘jokes’ about me being fat throughout our relationship.”

Jesse

• Published in Interesting
• November 14, 2023

A little humor here and there is healthy for relationships; it interjects laughter into otherwise ordinary moments. But for our narrator (Original Poster), the line between humor and subtle jabs blurred when her boyfriend's “fat jokes” began to feel more like pointed critiques.

It had been their usual pattern; she'd accept these jests and even feign offense. Her boyfriend would affectionately offer reassuring words, making it clear he was only joking.

But a few weeks ago, the tone shifted. He practically demanded that she put more effort into her appearance—she was getting fat. 

It stung, but despite the poor wording, OP tried to decipher a genuine concern for her well-being beneath the surface. She decided to take up jogging and start eating healthier.

Fast forward to today, and their shared moments on the couch took a distressing turn. OP noticed how his ‘playful’ pinches and jests morphed into a laser-focused examination of the extra fat around her belly and chin area.

The jig was up, and OP called him out. He finally admitted she was more attractive when she was thinner, even pointedly referring to an old college photo where OP was thin but battling body dysmorphia—he was aware of this.

This hit a nerve, and OP found herself tumbling into the vortex of insecurities fueled by her boyfriend. From gripes about her makeup to critiques of her weight, he didn’t even cut her some slack when she was stress eating to cope with her mother’s loss.

Sure, OP gained a little weight, but it wasn’t a seismic shift. How does OP navigate this emotional minefield?

Let’s dig into the details

A little background

OP’s boyfriend made it clear to her that he likes her thin

Some things for context

Some more info

Here’s how the Reddit community reacted to the story:

“Someone with this attitude is not long-term partner material.“

“He's not joking. He's manipulating you. Your instincts are right.”

“Your boyfriend is trying to belittle you and bring down any confidence you have remaining.”

“I suggest dumping him, since he doesn't respect you.“

“This is negging, a form of verbal put downs to make you feel like you're never good enough.“

Get out now before your ED comes back. Due to his shitty remarks your health is at risk.”

“It sounds like you probably really don’t need to lose weight. If you’re happy and healthy that’s all that matters.”

“I will never understand why people think it’s ok to constantly comment on their partner’s weight,.”

“You can lose 170 pounds overnight by dumping the rude and disrespectful man you call your boyfriend.”

Redditors caution that if her boyfriend makes such a fuss over a minor weight gain, what awaits as age takes its natural toll? Imagine the scrutiny when wrinkles and gray hairs emerge. 

They all agree that encouraging a healthy lifestyle is one thing, but shaming someone with a history of eating disorders is just toxic. 

It's time for OP to prioritize self-love and consider a healthier future without such negativity.

What do you think about this story? Let us know in the comments.

Jesse