Dad Ponders Early Retirement With Unused College Funds, Kids Claim Their Share

"So I empty the accounts to use for my retirement"

Damjan

• Published in Interesting
• January 23, 2024

Dealing with money in a family can get really tricky, especially when it's about saving for the kids. This story is about a parent who saved up a good chunk of money for their kids' college.

Each kid had around $50,000 set aside. But things didn't go as planned. The oldest went to a trade school that didn't cost much.

The daughter tried college but then decided to get married and be a stay-at-home mom. So, there's still a lot of money left in both accounts.

Now, the kids are doing fine on their own. The son makes good money, and the daughter's married to someone who's also doing well financially.

OP, thinking about their own future, decided to use the leftover college funds for retirement. When he told his kids over dinner, it blew up.

The kids got mad, saying they should still get the money even though it was meant for college and they didn't even chip in. OP was straightforward about why he wanted to retire early and use that money.

He knew it would come up eventually, maybe even with the kids wanting to use it for his grandkids. But now, everyone's upset, and it's a big mess.

OP has separate college savings accounts for each of his kids.

Both accounts still have a substantial amount of money, and both kids are financially stable now.

OP's kids claim they still should get the money even though it was meant for college.

The OP initially planned to use the money for early retirement.

It's not advisable to share personal financial information.

OP is not in wrong because he used the money for its intended purpose.

It's unreasonable for the college dropout to expect the leftover funds.

The lack of appreciation from kids is surprising.

It's OP's money, and he had supported them through their education.

The money wasn't an entitlement; it was meant as a potential study gift.

It would have been better for OP not to tell them about his retirement plans to avoid this conflict.

OP offered them higher education as a gift, and they chose what they wanted from it, OP doesn't owe them anything more.

They shouldn't expect anything left over and should appreciate the opportunity for a funded education, which many don't have.

Using it for oneself is justified as it wasn't originally their money.

Asking for more seems greedy!

Now, in this situation, OP did nothing wrong by using the money he saved for his kids' college as it was originally intended. The child who didn't go to college can't expect to get the extra money because it was meant for education, not for them to keep.

Surprisingly, the kids don't appreciate the help they get for their education, especially when many people don't have that opportunity. OP doesn't have to give them more than what was meant for education.

It might have been better if OP didn't say anything about using the leftover money for retirement to avoid this argument. But using that money for retirement is fair because it was never meant to be the kids' money in the first place.

Asking for more in this situation might seem like wanting too much. Families need to talk openly about money, but also to understand what was originally meant for what and to appreciate the help they received.

Damjan