Woman With Autistic Son Calls Friend Ableist After Refusing To Give Her Positive Reference For Dog Rescue

The woman said that her adult autistic son "sometimes doesn't know how to be gentle."

Ayoub

• Published in Animal Stories
• December 6, 2021

Rescuing a dog from a shelter can be one of the most rewarding things in your life. Knowing that you helped your dog transition from a rough living situation into a much more comfortable and happy life is the best feeling in the world. However, this transition is not often easy, considering how many shelter dogs come with serious emotional baggage that can impede the whole process.

This is why people need to be extra careful about what these dogs might be exposed to once they're adopted into their households. The worst thing you could do to these rescues is interfering with their healing process, which could lead to dangerous consequences for all involved parties.

Reddit user u/Expensive_Assist_616 asked the community in the r/AmItheA$$hole subReddit whether they are in the wrong "for refusing to give [THEIR] friend a positive reference for a dog rescue?" after explaining how their friend has an adult autistic son who could potentially mishandle the rescue dog. The Reddit community had a lot of different reactions to OP's post, however, the vast majority agreed on the potential dangers.

Scroll down and read the full original Reddit post with all the details, and if you want to read screenshots of the comments from the original post, just keep on scrolling!

Here's the original Reddit post from u/Expensive_Assist_616:

u/Expensive_Assist_616 was unsure whether they did the right thing by refusing to give her a reference.

Here's how Reddit users reacted to u/Expensive_Assist_616's situation:

Adding the kid to the equation makes it even more reasonable.

They have every right to defend themselves, it's just the way it is.

It seems that it's pretty obvious that she is the one in the wrong, OP's concerns are 100% valid.

It's basically a recipe for disaster, you just cannot ignore the potential dangers.

She tried to shame OP into referencing her, which is quite manipulative.

Yeah, that would be the reasonable thing to do.

There are a lot of factors that need to be considered...

Well, the mother did say that he "sometimes doesn't know how to be gentle."

That's pretty much the biggest red flag.

This is also a valid point, you cannot generalize.

Asking more questions would be the way to go in this situation.

This reference could have bad consequences, and better safe than sorry.

She could find other alternatives that don't involve her friend at all.

Trained dogs could be more suitable in this situation.

Dog breeds are different and they all enjoy different things.

This should also be put into consideration.

It all depends on the kid's behavior, we need more detail.

It's always better to take precautions.

Special care and attention, so why put it in potential danger.

It's not ableist, it's just precautionary.

It's a legitimate concern about the safety of another being.

In a world full of injustice and abuse, being extra careful when it comes to making sure that a defenceless animal will be treated properly is very important, because why take that risk? It's always better to be safe than sorry.

Especially considering the fact that shelter animals often come with serious emotional baggage that you cannot just ignore or help worsen. These animals need to be treated properly and gently so they can recover from their terrible past lives, if not, why even bother "rescuing" them if you're not planning to do any rescuing.

According to the information that was provided above, it seems like OP is definitely NTA.

Ayoub