Couple Fights Over Chores After BF Confronted GF About Her Habit Of Leaving The Kitchen Dirty Every Morning For Him To Clean

She told him he should clean up after her since he works from home which means his job "doesn't count"

Chelsi

• Published in Interesting
• February 28, 2023

Anyone who has been in a serious relationship can attest to how important communication is. It can make or break the bond you are forming with the person you are building a future with.

This OP from Reddit evidently knew that when he raised a concern with his 29-year-old live-in girlfriend. Her morning routine has been bothering him for a while, and he told her as much.

They have been together for four years and decided to move in during the height of the pandemic. They had a system that worked for them when they both worked from home.

OP was in charge of keeping the kitchen/living room clean while his GF took on bathroom duties. OP's job went fully remote when things calmed down while his GF had to report back to the office.

Their system has fallen apart since then. OP wakes up at 7:30 AM to clock in for his 8 AM job, while his GF gets up at 9 o'clock to leave by 9:45 AM.

She makes her breakfast and leaves a mess every day, which OP has to clean when he gets out of work at around 5:00 PM. It has been getting on OP's nerves after a whole day of hard work.

He said he works through the day without even having lunch. The only breaks he has are the 10-minute rests every few hours to walk his GF's dog.

His GF's kitchen disaster has been adding stress to OP's already full day. He brought the issue up, and she said she never asked for his help with cleaning.

She told OP to leave the kitchen for her to clean when she gets out of work and OP followed that instruction

Except for when he had to clean up a broken mug and coffee she spilled one morning and left behind

Other than that OP left all of the mess she created when she made her breakfast and it was a lot

When she got home, she saw that OP didn't clean the kitchen at all and she got mad at him.

She said the last thing she needed after a long day at work was a dirty apartment to come home to. OP said he also works hard and even the breaks he gets are all dedicated to her dog.

She retaliated that OP's hard work doesn't count because he works from OP. He had enough and told her that his job was also important because it pays for their apartment.

OP pays 75% of their house bills since he makes more than her while she takes care of the rest. OP's comment struck a nerve and he & the dog ended up sleeping on the living room couch while his GF stewed in the bedroom in anger.

Sharing chores doesn't mean you can act like that the other person is your maid. Adults are still expected to take care of themselves.

Petty commenters have more creative solutions for OP...

... which he doesn't think will help his case with his GF

They did correctly point out that OP's GF is taking advantage of his refusal to live in a dirty home

What if her dog got to the coffee shards and spills before OP did? That was so reckless of her.

OP is definitely doing most of the housekeeping even if he doesn't realize it

OP doesn't see that he is doing most of the work in their home

But it really is between him and his GF to decide what works for them but OP shouldn't forget that he also cooks nightly after a long day of not eating

It's time to revisit their system because it is skewed in favor of the GF & to the detriment of OP's peace of mind

Shared responsibilities do lighten the load, but the divide must be equitable to both parties. Sure, OP works from home, but it doesn't make his work less important or demanding.

His GF is being unfair to him, as the Redditors correctly pointed out. None of the commenters think that OP was at fault here, and it should give him clarity when he has another conversation with his GF about her morning habits.

Chelsi