Redditor's Boyfriend Invites Fifteen People To Dinner Instead Of The Agreed Two And Threatens To Cancel Everything If She Doesn't Cook

"I said I initially agreed to cook for 4 people not 15."

Filip

• Published in Interesting
• August 16, 2023

Hosting dinner is a wonderful way to gather friends, enjoy delicious food, and create new memories. It's an opportunity for the host to showcase their culinary skills.

However, it also requires careful planning and preparation, from curating the menu over cooking to ensuring the ambiance is just right. Recently, a Reddit user asked the Reddit community for unbiased opinions about hosting.

The OP is questioning if she's in the wrong for wanting her boyfriend to cook after he unexpectedly extended their guest list. Originally, the OP, a 23-year-old female, and her 25-year-old boyfriend planned a dinner only for themselves and another couple.

The OP agreed to cook for four attendees. However, without consulting her, the boyfriend invited their neighbors and their three children.

Later that day, he further informed her of his decision to invite two colleagues, their wives, and children, adding two more kids to the guest list. It increased the list from a total of four to fifteen guests.

Adding to her frustration, he suggested she prepare a separate dish for his colleagues' kids. Upset over the increased guest count and the assumption she'd adjust her cooking plans, she suggested her boyfriend should cook, especially since he had more free time that afternoon.

But he resisted, arguing she had already agreed to cook and even said he might cancel the dinner if she didn't comply. The OP is feeling torn, wondering if she should still handle the cooking, even with the extended guest list, or if it's fair for her boyfriend to take over cooking for the additional guests he invited without her consent.

Here is the OP's concern:

The OP agreed to cook for four people, but her boyfriend expanded the guest list to nine without consulting her:

But later that day, he invited six more people and told her to make different dishes for the children:

The OP got so upset and told him he should do the cooking:

But he refused, saying he would rather cancel the whole thing:

So, the OP seeks external perspectives on the situation:

Redditor told the OP if her boyfriend doesn't want to cook, she should let him cancel the dinner

Something like that:

"With any luck, he'll threaten to leave the house"

"Don't threaten me with a good time."

Well, it was supposed to be a dinner for four

"If I were you, I wouldn’t come home after work."

The OP added:

Redditors pointed the fact out to her

They should inform the couple that the original plans were changed

Redditor said that her boyfriend doesn't understand the changes he's made

But the OP explained:

She should let him take the consequences

"I guess it's canceled then."

"Personally I wouldn’t even come home that evening."

It’s so disrespectful to the first couple invited and the OP

Hosting dinner requires so much planning to prepare and organize everything and a lot of work until everything is ready. The OP's boyfriend clearly either doesn't understand the amount of work demanded or doesn't care.

In both scenarios, he should help with the preparations, especially since he has decided, on his own, to extend the guest list without consulting the OP.

Filip