Lady Turns Down Proposal From Boyfriend Of Two Years Citing Lack Of Effort And Poor Choice Of Ring

“I know what I deserve—and this ain’t it!”

Jesse

• Published in Interesting
• February 19, 2024

Our narrator (Original Poster) had been with her partner for two blissful years. They’d been living together for the past year and even planning to buy a home together—so it wasn’t unusual that discussions of marriage floated around as well.

OP was very clear about the kind of ring she wanted; she didn’t even mind going antique shopping together. But one thing was for sure—under no circumstances did she want a ring from a big box store.

 When her boyfriend suggested getting her a promise ring to symbolize their next big chapter, she didn’t object. He showed her a selection of big box store rings, and OP thought: well, it was a promise ring; no harm in using this, right? 

So why did she return from work a week later only to find her partner on one knee, holding out the ‘promise ring’ she selected? It was utter confusion and disappointment.

There was no music, no photos, no effort, really—the entire proposal fell flat. Not to mention, he used the one ring she deemed off-limits for her engagement. Despite the initial shock, OP surprisingly said yes.

But when the time came to break the news to the parents, OP had an awakening. She had been clear about how she envisioned her proposal and her desire for an antique ring—something unique and meaningful. Yet, he seemed to miss the memo entirely. 

Not only did she withdraw her yes, but she was seriously rethinking marrying him and buying a home together. Was she taking things too far?

The story in detail

A bit of background

OP came back home to find her boyfriend on one knee in their living room. However, it seemed that her boyfriend didn’t put any effort into the surprise

Not only was OP upset that her boyfriend proposed with a promise ring, she was disappointed at the entire set-up

As it stands, OP is not sure how to go forward with their relationship

This Redditor did a deep dive and found out that this is not the first time OP is complaining about her boyfriend

The couple should probably suspend buying a house together till the’ve sorted themselves out

“This isn’t the thread for this, but don’t buy a home with someone you aren’t married with.”

“You can keep dating and living together if that’s what you mutually want.  But do not get married and DO NOT buy a house.”

“Seriously, I get the thing about the ring but the rest of this makes you sound more like you're 16 instead of 26.”

“I would be disappointed if my partner knew I didn’t want a traditional ring and did the exact opposite.”

“You have every right to be upset about what he did and anyone who says otherwise is just plain wrong.”

It seemed OP and her boyfriend had some tough conversations ahead. They needed to revisit their expectations, desires, and communication styles.

Ultimately, Redditors believed the couple wasn’t ready for the commitment of buying a house together. Some community detectives even did some digging and unearthed some deeper issues that screamed “trouble in paradise.”

The consensus? The relationship needs A LOT of work.

Do you agree with this verdict? Let us know in the comments.

Jesse