Redditor Is Looking For Ways To Tell Boyfriend That His Weight Is Becoming Problem Without Hurting Him

OP's boyfriend has put on a lot of weight and she doesn't know how to bring it up.

Senad

• Published in Interesting
• December 10, 2023

In the labyrinth of love, sometimes we encounter challenges that tug at the delicate threads of attraction and well-being. This Redditor finds herself at a crossroads in her relationship with Jim, her boyfriend of three months. What once bloomed as a rekindled flame from high school crushes now faces the complexities of physical health and self-image.

OP reminisces about the Jim she admired in high school—nerdy, musically talented, funny, and a skateboarding enthusiast. A friend at the time, Jim was off-limits due to his relationship with OP's friend. Fate, however, brought them together again last summer, and they embarked on a romantic journey. But, as life would have it, changes occurred that now pose a challenge.

Jim, once lanky and agile, has undergone a significant weight gain, especially in his midsection. OP describes his stomach as looking "like he's 7 months pregnant." The weight gain affects not only Jim's physical appearance but also intimacy and overall well-being.

Despite expressing dissatisfaction with his body, Jim seems caught in a cycle of unhealthy habits, consuming fast food regularly and leading a sedentary lifestyle.

Concerned for Jim's health and, admittedly, her own evolving attraction, OP grapples with the delicate task of broaching this sensitive topic. She emphasizes Jim's sensitivity to criticism and seeks advice on how to approach the conversation without causing harm.

This predicament raises broader questions about communication and support in relationships. How do we address sensitive subjects related to our partner's health without hurting their feelings? How do we express our concerns without coming across as judgmental?

In situations like these, experts often suggest framing the conversation with "I" statements, focusing on feelings rather than blame. Expressing care and concern for Jim's well-being while acknowledging their shared history and her desire to see him engage in the activities he once loved could be a starting point.

The update from OP underscores the importance of open communication. Jim, when confronted with the issue, admitted that he hadn't fully realized its significance and expressed a willingness to make an effort.

OP and her boyfriend, Jim, have been dating for about 3 months but they go way back

Jim used to be more into physical activity during their high school days

Jim has put on a lot of weight since the two started talking

Even though Jim mentions his body every day, he hasn't done anything to fix his issue

Every time OP brings this up, Jim brushes it off

OP is looking for a way to talk to him about this without hurting him

In an update, OP shared that Jim didn't realize how important this was to OP

Sounds like depression

Don't waste your time fixing him

The first step

OP deserves happiness

This isn't a healthy relationship

As OP and Jim embark on this journey of understanding and change, their story becomes a testament to the resilience of relationships when built on a foundation of empathy and communication.

The challenges they face today may well become stepping stones toward a healthier, more vibrant future together. After all, love, like a delicate flower, requires nurturing and care to bloom in all its glory.

Senad