BF Uses His Friends To Badger His GF Into Lowering His Share Of The Rent Because He Found Out That She Pays A Portion Of Her Sister's Rent

"Tell them to pay his share if they think it’s so unfair."

Chelsi

• Published in Interesting
• March 25, 2023

If the goal of a monogamous relationship is to build a life together, then moving in is a step in the right direction. Although it should be, that isn't always the case.

Living and sharing one space with a significant other can reveal problems in the relationship. Incompatibility issues can be hard to ignore once the novelty of living together wears off.

It just took several months for this couple to see the cracks in their relationship. The reason for their most recent fight is the boyfriend's share of the rent.

OP has an apartment in Central London. She and her sister have lived there for a year before OP's BF joined them.

They have an agreement to split the rent equally among the three of them. Unknown to OP's BF, she has been paying a portion of her sister's rent since the beginning.

OP has a well-paying job while her sister's career in musical theater is spotty at best. Her sister also works as a waitress from time to time but what she earns is not enough to pay her third of the rent.

So, she and OP have an agreement. OP will pay the rest of her share of the rent while she takes the lion's share of the household chores.

They are both satisfied with this exchange, but the BF had an issue with it when he found out. OP's sister asked him to go over her budget to see if she miscalculated anything.

He was shocked by the amount of rent she pays. OP's sister explained why her rent is less than his, but he acted even weirder and said he thought their parents paid for the sister's rent.

When OP got home, she repeated what her sister said and he got even more annoyed

He said OP isn't considering the fact that he also earns less than him and it would be great if he also paid less in rent

OP told him that if he wanted a lower rent, he should move out because she is not lowering his share

He told OP that she is being unfair and left. His friends supported him and they told OP that she's acting like a jerk and she's not showing any real commitment to their relationship.

Redditors argued at first if OP was indeed being unfair to her BF

She added another reason why her sister's rent is lower than his, plus her BF offered to pay a third of the rent

Why was she discussing her budget with him in the first place?

Thanks to OP's sister, the BF's true nature has come to the surface

OP mentioned by the end that she isn't that committed to the relationship yet which makes it odd why she agreed to her BF moving in

OP said it made sense for them at that time which is why him moving in seemed like a good idea

They advised OP to to drop the BF if all he does is whine to his friends at the first sign of trouble

There are a lot more fun people out there with a lot less baggage to deal with

Since his problem is the rent, he can look for a cheaper place and maybe salvage the relationship

OP and her sister have a fair exchange that works for them. The BF is benefitting from it, too since the apartment is kept tidy by OP's sister.

When he asked for a lower rent, did he offer a service in exchange of it? Will he be taking over half of the chores OP's sister is dealing with?

If there's nothing more the boyfriend can offer other than drama and guilt through his friends, then OP will be better off cutting him loose. He was happy to pay for a third of the rent until he realized he could probably guilt OP into lowering it.

It's a great thing that OP knows what's good for her, and it's rapidly getting clear that her BF is not one of those things. Redditors reassured OP that she was not the a**hole, and it should help her ease her doubts a little bit.

Chelsi