30 People Share Their Candid Opinions On Things That Scream ‘I’m A Bad Parent,’ And They're Eye-Opening

A lot of internet users were interested in the author's thread and you will too

Maryjane

• Published in Interesting
• January 23, 2023

There are a few subjects that almost everyone seems to have strong feelings about. Politics. Religion. Parenting, too!

Your opinions on the ideal way to raise your children reveal a lot about your character and your moral principles. It can be very challenging to decide which parenting style is best for a particular family because there are so many different parenting philosophies.

However, most individuals can usually tell when a parent has seriously messed up when it comes to warning signs and behaviors to avoid. Although it occurs frequently, it is far easier to recognize when someone else has made a mistake than when you have.

And it's simple to undervalue the value of attentive listening, tolerance, encouragement, and constancy. After asking the r/AskReddit online community about the actions that practically scream that someone is a horrible parent, Redditor u/ViForYourAttention went viral.

These online users didn't hold anything back and gave everyone their frank, unadulterated opinions. They discussed the parenting red flags and improper conduct that, in their opinion, needs to cease right away.

At the time this article was written, the post by u/ViForYourAttention had received over 43.4k upvotes. In addition, many Redditors thought the question was so crucial that they gave the OP a ton of awards just for bringing it up in the first place.

Continue reading below to see what they had to say.

The question is popped...

1. "Never saying sorry to the kid when the parents make a mistake."

2. Shameful Secrets

idk if this really screams it, but i absolutely hate when adults tell other adults their children’s shameful secrets for no reason. even strangers! it tells me those children probably don’t feel like they can trust their parents.

3. Saying "You're too young to be depressed" and ignoring red flags from mental illnesses.

4. "Your own children being afraid of you, no child should be afraid of the person that looks after them nearly 24/7"

5. Invalidation

Invalidating your child's feelings, struggles, and/or mental illness in favor of "you don't know what struggling *really* is" or some form of "back in my day" or "you kids are so weak".

You have just robbed your child of support, told them their feelings do not matter, and informed them that you are not a safe person to confide in.

6. "Demeaning your children as means of punishment"

7. Not believing in telling your children “no”

The world will and *should* tell them “no” at times. They need to be prepared for that reality, or they will be an absolute menace to everyone around them.

8. "Using children as pawns in divorces or separations."

9. "Treating your kid as your therapist."

10. "Blaming your own mistakes and regrets on your kids"

11. "Treating your son as the man of the house because you’re single"

12. "Zero interest in the kid. Doesn’t care what they do or what happens to them as long as they don’t inconvenience them."

13. No, No

"You're the reason I'm stuck with your father !"

Sure mom, sure...

14. "Parents who can’t apologize to a child. It’s ok to have human emotions and moment to be triggered or struggling and lash out or be wrong but for the love of all things good APOLOGIZE AND CHANGE."

15. Comparison

16. "Not giving the kids rights/privacy"

17. "Making your child think they arent good enough"

18. "Your adult children don’t talk to you"

19. Pretty bad

I volunteer at/ have had student placements at a children’s hospital and we’ve had patients with serious brain injuries due to abuse (shaking, attempted drowning, etc.). So yeah I’d say those parents are pretty bad

20. "Thinking that small children are just selfish tiny adults."

Your kid isn't asking for stuff because they are selfish (mostly-we're excluding their occasional manipulative tendenices). They are doing it because they are 5. Don't be a d**k to your kid because they are asking for support/help/food.

21. "Attacking the self esteem in any way…"

22. Regulating their emotions

Recording your child while they're having a meltdown/tantrum and posting it on social media (for likes, clout, assurance or whatnots, no idea what they're thinking).

Instead of helping them to regulate their emotions and understand what causes the emotion, how to deal with it, and that there are appropriate ways to communicate your feelings

23. Extra points

24. "The infantilization of their children. Wanting them to stay helpless babies forever because they don’t want them to grow up."

I’m a nanny and it seems like a growing trend.

It’s one thing to engage is some infantile behavior or spoil your children a little. It’s another thing to bend to every whim and not make your kids uncomfortable. Example with some kids I’m currently dealing with, NOT POTTY TRAINING THEM.

25. "Remember: The opposite of love isn't hate. It's indifference."

If you see kids being neglected, or ignored, or not cared about _at all_, that's a good indication that their parent/s aren't good

26. Do this and that

27. Smoking

28. "Food Shaming, that’s a slide into an ED and lifelong Trauma. You can usually immediately tell if a child comes from a household like that or not"

29. Doing Sports

30. "Not correcting your kids"

A good parent is one who offers stability and balance. Parenting is not perfect, even when done well.

It's about adjusting to change as the kids get older and doing it in a way that keeps the relationship good and healthy. There are far too many Redditors who have experienced neglect or even abuse directly, which is a tragic fact that many of the people reading the thread could relate to. 

Maryjane