First-Time Mom Listens To Her Mother And Rubs Whiskey On Her Baby's Aching Gums Which Caused Her Husband To Distrust Her Parenting Skills

He took a leave of absence from work to oversee her parenting which she thinks is an overreaction

Chelsi

• Published in Interesting
• April 14, 2023

I cannot imagine dealing with the paranoia that comes after having a baby. Humans that small are vulnerable to everything!

There is no way to tell quickly what's wrong with them. The only indication that a baby is in distress is when they cry.

Even then, it's difficult to decipher what is going on exactly. They will not stop crying until their discomfort or pain is addressed.

I witnessed some relatives who were first-time parents cry when they couldn't get their babies to calm down. It's easy to believe that you are failing your child when you can't figure out what they need.

In those moments, the best people to ask for guidance are our parents. They raised children before and stored a ton of parenting knowledge... right?

Not all the time, and a first-time mom learned this lesson recently. She was over at her mom's house when she confided about her six-month-old baby's ongoing teething issues.

OP's mom is a big believer in home remedies, herbal medication, and natural healing. Her suggestion to OP was to rub whiskey on her baby's gums.

She apparently did this successfully when it was OP and her siblings who were teething. With that anecdote in mind, OP agreed to the whiskey solution.

OP is happy to report that whiskey remedy quickly calmed her daughter

OP told her husband about her mom's magical solution and he flipped out on her. He has since taken a leave of absence from work to watch OP like a hawk while she's with their daughter.

OP made a mistake in trusting her mom to have a reliable advice

People absolutely used these types of home remedies before scientific data debunked them and proved they endanger infants

OP didn't intentionally harm her child, it was a bad judgment call

OP, her husband, and her mom need to have an adult conversation about boundaries instead of this ongoing silent war

The first thing OP needs to do is admit she made a mistake and avoid invalidating her husband's fears about her parenting skills

OP was at her wit's end looking for a way to soothe her baby and it's only natural to confide in her mom

They made mistakes and the husband's concerns should not be swept under the rug

They need to work things out for the benefit of the baby

Google was readily available, but even finding a peer-reviewed source requires more scrutiny because the search results would most likely be from blogs

If this whiskey remedy was passed down from generation to generation and proved no harm to all the babies it was administered to, it's understandable why OP & her mom made the mistake

Some people were less gracious and straight up told OP she acted like an a**hole for not knowing better

OP has to be more cautious moving forward especially when it comes to the health of your own baby

It's better to call your pediatrician when it comes to concerns like these

OP has to be careful not to dismiss her husband's concerns. Her mistake made him lose trust in her and it is understandable. The both of them are just looking out for their child.

Her mom did use this remedy on OP and her siblings. They weren't harmed by it, so they thought it's still a sound remedy to this day.

OP needs to develop a healthy amount of skepticism for the sake of her baby. In the mean time, she just has to keep showing her husband that one mistake does not make her a bad mom until he trusts her again.

OP learned a lot from her mistake, that's for sure

Agreed, they have to be kinder to each other because mistakes are normal even in parenting

OP shouldn't brush off her husband's concerns as overreactions. OP made a mistake as a first-time mom, and it was a big one, but it doesn't make her a bad mother.

None of what happened was intentionally done to harm the infant. Nevertheless, OP was shown some grace in the subreddit and was advised not to let one mistake discourage her from trying to be a better mom.

Chelsi