Attention-Seeking Aunt Plans Early Mother's Day Celebration On The Same Day Of Her Niece's 4th Birthday And Plays The Victim When People Decline To Attend

Her inconsiderate planning forced her sister to re-evaluate their relationship

Chelsi

• Published in Interesting
• May 16, 2023

Forced celebration with people you can barely tolerate is a hellish way to spend your time. The people who organize these forced parties should be the easiest to go low contact, but they are often master manipulators.

A Reddit mom learned just how difficult it is to pull away from toxic family members. OP was used to being an afterthought in their family, but she drew the line when it affected her daughter.

OP's 28-year-old sister has been organizing family dinners for them to catch up. OP doesn't know what brought on this new frenzy but mentioned that her sister is recently married.

The issue this time is the early Mother's Day dinner clashed with her daughter's birthday. OP's daughter is about to celebrate her fourth birthday, and everyone in their family is invited.

Her sister lived thirty minutes away from them and didn't want to drive that far twice for two separate parties. Her solution was to hold the Mother's Day event right after the birthday party.

She made the reservation without asking for anyone's availability and informed everyone about the event. OP declined since she planned to celebrate the whole day with her daughter.

OP said they could celebrate without her because she would visit their mom on the date of the actual Mother's Day. OP thought what her sister did was rude, but it was nothing new.

Their family doesn't treat OP's daughter the same way as the other kids

They all support her sister's son when he has soccer games but find any excuse they can to avoid her daughter's gymnastic meets. OP's daughter has autism, and they act like her feelings don't get hurt because she is young.

OP was even forced to babysit her nephew during her bridal shower because her sister had to go on a date

So, this Mother's Day event was the last straw. It turned into a huge fight and her sister left their family group chat.

OP was accused of being selfish because her sister had an important announcement to make during the Mother's Day dinner

OP didn't back down and said they can pick another day that won't clash with her daughter's birthday. They stopped talking to her and OP thinks they won't attend her daughter's party.

Besides, won't a 4-year-old be too tired after a whole day of celebrating her birthday?

Not to jump to conclusions but the favoritism is too obvious to ignore

It has happened to OP's niece before, so the unfair treatment just moved to her daughter

OP's only concern is her daughter's happiness. She owes them nothing after the way they talked to her.

OP needs to decide if these are the people she wants around her and her kids

OP shouldn't lose sleep over someone who is determined to treat their own family this way

They could be treating OP's daughter differently from the other kids because of her autism

If they are choosing to continue to be this ignorant, how much value do they add to OP's life anyway?

This is all we needed to know to advise OP to slowly lessen her contact with her family

Her daughter shouldn't be around anyone who others her because of her autism

Since OP experienced it before, she knows how damaging her family's attitude is to a person with autism

Her daughter is already starting to realize that her own family treats her differently from her cousins

OP thought her family has grown from their outdated thinking, but seeing how worse they've become means she has a difficult choice to make

If her family boycotts her daughter's party, OP can extend the invite to the kids from her class

OP already invited her daughter's pre-school classmates and she is quickly rethinking how to change her daughter's party to focus on the children instead of her stressful family

OP tries very hard to be a part of their lives but they are not showing the same effort and barely try to know anything about hers

OP can find a new community that will support her and her kids better than her family ever did

Even if her sister attends the birthday party, she could find a way to make it all about her

OP needs a new plan before her family can ruin the birthday party her daughter was so excited about

OP is already doing a great job protecting her daughter from people who won't appreciate her

She can let her sister and the rest of their family throw a tantrum while OP busies herself preparing for her daughter's awesome birthday

OP posted that the arcade party is cancelled. Her daughter and her friends will go to Knott's Berry Farm to have an even more awesome day than what was originally planned.

FM (flying monkey) is OP's nickname for her older brother. She is also starting to cut her sister off by removing her from their phone plan.

Reddit helped a mom realize that she and her daughter deserve better than the half-assed bare minimum from their own family. OP will feel lighter when she sheds off the toxic family members bogging her down.

Her post was flooded with thousands of supportive comments reassuring her that she was doing the right thing for her daughter. There is no doubt that they had a blast at Knott's Berry Farm without their attention-hogging family members.

Chelsi