Mom Of Two Unsettled By Aunt's Behavior With Kids, Redditors Fear Aunt Aims To Replace Her

"Wouldn't be surprised if she introduces her as her daughter to strangers."

Chelsi

• Published in Interesting
• March 17, 2024

A 40-year-old mom of two got the cold shoulder treatment from the designated cool aunt of her husband's family. It happened after OP informed her husband's Aunt Ann that she no longer had to pick their kids up from school.

OP felt guilty because her kids genuinely enjoyed spending time with Ann. On the other hand, OP was also relieved because she thought Ann was inexplicably strange, especially about the kids.

OP couldn't pinpoint what made her uneasy about Ann, but the feeling lingered. She cited several examples that she felt supported her intuitions.

OP didn't have a car when she gave birth to her daughter. Ann offered to drive them to her daughter's check-ups, which OP gratefully accepted.

At the doctor's office, when it was their turn, Ann grabbed OP's baby from the cot and brought her inside the clinic. During another visit, Ann asked OP to hand her baby over to her because she didn't trust OP not to drop the infant as they went down the stairs.

Ann said OP looked unwell and could easily fall. When OP bought a car, Ann said she didn't trust OP to drive her niece around.

Ann also phrases her compliments about OP's daughter unusually. She said OP's daughter was beautiful and intelligent... just like her aunt.

Ann wasn't supposed to pick up OP's kids from school. That task was asked of OP's MIL with Ann just listed as one of the kids' trusted people.

Ann eventually took over the kids' pickup, and OP was not too happy about it. Ann takes OP's kids to places without asking for her or her husband's input.

OP decided to do the pickup when her work hours were cut. She called Ann to inform her of the change to their routine.

OP told Ann that she was welcome to spend time with the children once in a while. Ann said she would do everything for the kids — a phrase she used often.

OP noticed how aloof Ann had been since that phone call. She avoided family gatherings. She told OP's MIL that their phone conversation upset her.

OP felt guilty for stirring up family drama, but she's also secretly relieved.

Her kids had a lot of fun with Ann, but OP couldn't shake her unease about her husband's Aunt.

OP's passivity enabled Ann's odd behavior towards her kids.

OP explained that the school pickup issue with Ann didn't happen overnight. She talked to her husband about it, but he didn't initially see why it bothered OP.

It was right for OP to go to her husband about her discomfort towards Ann's behavior around their kids.

Her husband eventually saw the issue from OP's perspective, but he tried to make compromises with OP first instead of creating boundaries with his Aunt

Redditors deduced what bothered OP about Ann's behavior. She behaved like a mother to OP's children.

In her reply, OP explained why Ann had a special role in her husband's family.

OP's concern about Ann was shared by a lot of the commenters.

Ann treated OP like a surrogate mom. OP felt this when she read what Ann wrote on her birthday card after she gave birth to her son.

Redditors advised OP to trust her motherly instincts.

Ann's decision to distance herself is her problem to deal with, not OP's.

Redditors advised OP to remove Ann from her children's trusted people list at school. OP shouldn't have to pretend she was okay with how Ann treated their children when every bone in her body told her there was something off.

Ann may just be attached to the kids, or she may be feeling regret about not having children herself but none of it is for OP or her children to solve. This mom of two shouldn't feel guilty about spending more time with her children, even if it meant that their cool aunt took the back seat for once.

Chelsi