40 Of The Most Hilarious One-Liner Jokes That You Probably Haven't Heard Before

"My mom asked me to hand out invitations for my brother’s surprise birthday party and that’s when I realized he was the favorite twin."

Kylin

• Published in Funny
• January 10, 2023

One of the best feelings ever is making someone laugh. There’s something about the knowledge that you’re making a moment in someone else’s life a little brighter, the pride in concocting a hilarious joke, and the shared enjoyment that can really pack a dopamine-filled punch.

A one-liner is an excellent style of joke. As the name implies, these jokes are short and sweet and typically have the punchline within the same sentence as the setup.

Common one-liners are like a stereotypical Dad-joke or a pun. Sometimes they’re overly cheesy and can illicit a groan just as likely as a laugh, but there’s no denying how clever these jokes can be.

And with being a short-and-sweet type of joke, you can enjoy many in a very short period. Unlike having to read (or sit through) the build-up for a more involved joke, these are quick moments of comedic relief.

If you’re also a fan of these silly jokes, you’re in the right place. We collected some of the best one-liners you might not have heard before into an easy-to-consume list for your enjoyment.

So now is the time for you to continue scrolling to check out these clever one-liners. Whether you enjoy puns, outright silly jokes, jokes that make you think for a second, or just straight-up corny jokes, we have something for everyone.

Humans are scared of hippos because they're violent and responsible for hundreds of deaths per year, when in reality, people kill way more people per year, so that’s just being hippocritical.

u/808gecko808

If there's one thing that makes me throw up, it's a dart board on a ceiling.

u/madazzahatter

Dropped a tub of margarine on my foot last month and it still hurts, I can't belive it's not better.

u/simmo28

My wife keeps telling me that I’m the cheapest person she has ever met in her life but I’m just not buying it.

u/808gecko808

With the rise of self driving vehicles, it’s only a matter of time until there’s a country song where the guy’s truck leaves him.

u/andersonfmly

I wanted to marry my English teacher when she got out of jail, but apparently, you can’t end a sentence with a proposition.

u/808gecko808

My mom asked me to hand out invitations for my brother’s surprise birthday party and that’s when I realized he was the favorite twin.

u/808gecko808

I named my eraser Confidence because it gets smaller after every mistake I make.

u/honolulu_oahu_mod

Slightly peeved that the makers of the shampoo, "Head and Shoulders" have not followed up with a body wash called, "Knees and toes."

u/808gecko808

Why is it spelled “camouflage” and not

u/PartTimeCrazy

“There are no words in the English language that have all the vowels in alphabetical order,” he said facetiously.

u/FinalCaveat

I think the Discovery Channel should be on a different channel everyday.

u/VERBERD

"I" before "E," except when your foreign neighbor Keith receives eight counterfeit beige sleighs from weird feisty caffeinated weightlifters.

u/daaave33

Gravity is one of the most fundamental forces in the universe, but if you remove it, you get gravy.

u/madazzahatter

Build a man a fire and he'll be warm for the night, set a man on fire and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.

u/Kamikaze_AZ22

It's crazy that it's July 5th and people are still setting off fireworks, one nearly set my Christmas tree on fire.

u/wtfover

“DO NOT TOUCH” must be one of the most terrifying things to read in braille.

u/SleepingBeetle

Justice is a dish best served cold, if it were served warm, it would be justwater.

u/VERBERD

Superglue can also be used for cleaning your computer keyboarddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddd

u/WhoElseButAlf

It's kind of disgraceful that even after 50 years many people have no idea who Neil Armstrong was, let alone what kind of trumpet he played.

u/andersonfmly

OK, just so everybody's clear, I'm going to put my glasses on.

u/CrimsonAvenger_ZA

As a kid I thought a warehouse was a man who at full moon turned into a house.

u/schnklchlpfr

I met a guy who was convinced that there were no words in the English language with more syllables than vowels, so I tried to explain to him that he was wrong, but he refused to accept criticism.

u/808gecko808

The adjective for metal is metallic but not so for iron, which is ironic.

u/808gecko808

Like most men my age, I'm 51.

u/awesome_smokey

My wife asked me to put ketchup on the shopping list that I was making and now, I can’t read anything.

u/madazzahatter

Why the hell did they name them ‘Soldier ants’ and not ‘Combatants’?

u/VERBERD

A shark can swim faster than me, but I can run faster than a shark, so in a triathlon, it would all come down to who is the better cyclist.

u/808gecko808

I'm always frank with my sexual partners. I don't want them knowing my real name.

u/wtfover

At a job interview I was asked if I could perform under pressure, I said no but I could have a fair crack at Bohemian Rhapsody

u/simmo28

If your Tesla gets stolen, is it called an Edison now?

u/jweber96

Adam and Eve were the first people to agree to Apple's terms and conditions without reading them.

u/Skyfer_the_Youtuber

Will glass coffins be a success? Remains to be seen.

u/ScazBaz

Did you hear about the person who invented the "knock-knock" joke? He won the Nobel prize.

u/H-ost19

Geology rocks but geography is where it’s at.

u/EliDrInferno

People are usually shocked when they find out I'm not a very good electrician.

u/Chatters01

I hate Russian dolls, they're so full of themselves.

u/Fooldimi

If I got 50 cents for every failed math exam, I'd have $ 6.30 now

u/Andrew9820

If life gives you melons, you might be dyslexic.

u/besjbo

It's hard to explain puns to kleptomaniacs because they always take things literally.

u/NascentEcho

I pondered why that Frisbee was getting bigger, but then it hit me...

u/daaave33

The ingenious creativity that goes into making up jokes is genuinely a talent that I’m envious of. While I definitely have a lot of clever moments, I’ll never be known for my comedic prowess.

Which one-liner was your favorite? Do you have a great one-liner to share?

Let us know in the comments section below. And be sure to share this with a friend who could use a chuckle!

Kylin